The Gift of Second Chances

It’s that sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach, maybe your body starts shaking, your shoulders slump; it’s like the air has left your body - all possible ways of how you might feel when you screw up something important to you. It could be a major project at work, a relationship, a performance, or an important exam. There are plenty of instances in life where you will make mistakes and completely botch things up; it’s a part of being human. You can mess things up for yourself or others, or they can mess up things for you. 

Recently, I attended my niece’s holiday choir concert. The show choir performed Mariah Carey’s “All I Want For Christmas Is You.” The little girl who had the intro solo was really off pitch. I thought to myself, "She must be nervous." As someone who used to perform solos, I really felt for her. I know how terrible it feels to embarrass yourself when you know you’re capable of doing so much better.

At the end of the concert, after they performed the last number, the choir director took the mic and said that the kids would be performing an encore of Mariah’s song. The intro soloist stepped up to the mic once again, and this time she sang beautifully. I heard the choir director say afterwards that she didn’t want her student to be stuck with the memory of not doing well. That really struck me; she was given a second chance, she took it, and she rocked it. My heart filled for the student and for the choir director who provided her with that opportunity. 

How often do we get a second chance? How often do we give a second chance? And, perhaps more importantly, how often do we take the second chances we’re given? 

About a year ago, I went to a new dental office. It was a fiasco. Not only did they fill the wrong tooth, but I sat in the chair for over 3 hours. It seems I had my appointment the day of their office party. They had to give me more shots so they could work on the tooth I had come in for since the prior anesthetic had worn off. I was livid. Fast forward to nearly a year later, and my filling came out. I thought I would give them one more chance, since they needed to fix this. I sat in the waiting room for an hour before I was even called back. It took another hour for them to take some X-rays and tell me that I need a crown - that can’t be done for several weeks. I gave them a second chance; they will not be getting a third. 

Some people or experiences don’t deserve a second chance, and that’s o.k. It’s entirely up to you whether you choose to give them one or not. You have to listen to your gut on that one, especially if those close to you are trying to persuade you otherwise. There’s nothing wrong with looking after your own safety and best interests. 

After a health diagnosis and major surgery, I felt like the Universe was giving me a second chance. A chance to take a deeper look at how I was living and how I wanted to live. A second chance to actually go for my dreams. I was getting another opportunity to really live life instead of letting life live me. That entire situation helped me realize that none of us know how long we have on this planet and that we should make the best of it, and the most of it, while we’re here. 

Life is always providing us with opportunities; it’s what we do with them that matters. If you can, give yourself a second chance  - at love, at following your dreams, at stretching your comfort zone. If there are a lot of red flags, then reconsider and direct your energy elsewhere. And, just like the choir director, when you’re able to give someone a second chance, allow yourself to give that gift; it can really mean the world to them. 

​Heart Hugs,
Adrienne