“O’er the land of the free and the home of the brave.” - Francis Scott Key As it is Independence Day here in the United States, it’s an opportunity to reflect on our freedoms. Though not complete freedoms, we do have a lot of leeway in regards to political, economic, religious, intellectual, digital, and personal liberties. There are also a lot of constraints around those freedoms and complacency is not going to bring about more freedom. Quite the contrary, it’s how we’ll lose our freedoms. As Americans, we will proudly tell anyone that we are a democracy. Imagine my shock when I spent some time in Switzerland and realized that they have a direct democracy. The people actually get to vote directly on issues; unlike our representative democracy, where we elect people to decide and vote for us. I know there are quite a few issues here in the States that I would like to directly vote on and feel like my voice actually matters. We have the freedom to vote, but everything is basically controlled by the two parties who choose our candidates. If the two current presidential candidates are the best these parties have to offer, it’s high time for a change and for the public to start paying attention to the Independent candidates. We have freedom of speech, yet we don’t if it goes against the powers that be. Whether you were for the vaccine or against it is of personal preference. What I found beyond disturbing was to see people who were trying to educate the public of the possible cons of the new vaccines, so that we could make a somewhat educated decision, were slandered and silenced. Their bank accounts frozen, their licenses threatened. We have been granted critical thinking skills for a reason. One of the greatest freedoms we have is to question and think for ourselves which can become challenging when information is controlled, withheld, manipulated, or fear-driven. “The function of freedom is to free someone else” - Toni Morrison I believe every human on this planet deserves the right to “life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness,” as stated in the Declaration of Independence. Sadly, there are many who live with more restrictions than freedom. There are an estimated 49.6 million people in modern slavery worldwide, 54% are women and girls, and 12 million are children. (ILO, United Nations; OUR Rescue). Human trafficking involves forced labor, sex trafficking, forced marriages, and child soldiers. It’s estimated that over 1 million people are living in modern slavery within the United States (GSI). You can help make a difference by becoming aware of the signs and (like the slogan post 9/11), if you see something, say something. "We must be free not because we claim freedom, but because we practice it." — William Faulkner When we think of the freedoms I mentioned above, those are external liberties. The freedoms I would like to celebrate today are the internal ones. Freedom from sabotaging beliefs, freedom from emotional blockages, freedom from the inner critic, as well as freedom from the walls we put up to protect ourselves from pain. I believe the most important and profound freedom is that of the Soul. The freedom to discover and express your most authentic self. The freedom to tap into and express your creativity. The freedom to connect with your innate gifts and talents and share them with the world. The freedom to shine your authentic light as fully and brightly as possible instead of dimming it, shrinking, and playing small. "Freedom lies in being bold." — Robert Frost It takes work to liberate ourselves from the societal, cultural, religious, and familial shackles that can hold our Soul back. Once removed, you will feel a greater sense of wholeness, connection, spaciousness, joy, and peace. It takes courage to question and challenge our beliefs. Often, we have taken on the beliefs of others without having realized it. It takes boldness to do the inner healing work from our past wounds and traumas; to heal the remnants from our past that weigh us down in the present. It takes persistence to silence that inner critic and allow our Soul’s voice to come through. Again, complacency does not lead to freedom. Being courageous, taking a stand for yourself, and stepping into action are what lead to freedom. While we may not have a lot of control around our external freedoms, we most certainly do when it comes to our internal freedom. Wishing you a Happy Independence Day,
Adrienne :)
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I was having a conversation with someone recently. This person is very dear to me, but we don't often see eye to eye. I started to feel frustrated as her beliefs are the stark opposite of my own. I voiced my take on the subject, she voiced hers. We were at an impasse, both feeling flustered, and we finally agreed to each their own.
It can come up in any conversation, that difference in opinion. How I see things and how you see things that are at opposite ends of the spectrum. What’s true for me is not true for you and vice versa. So, who’s right? More importantly, does being right even matter in the grand scheme of things? We tend to, whether consciously or unconsciously, tie our identity to our beliefs which is a big part of why we’ll defend them tooth and nail. We are each allowed our own beliefs, so why do we sometimes feel the need to impose them onto others? Usually, it’s to reinforce our identity. “I’m right, you’re wrong.” What if, just what if, you’re not right, or maybe you’re only partly right? We’re usually caught up defending a few pixels when there’s a much bigger picture. It’s like we’re only seeing pieces of a puzzle and think we know what the full design is. We may even be absolutely convinced that we know what the design is. That is, until we come across a puzzle piece that doesn’t fit with our view. It is then that we start to consider that maybe we’re not so sure of the design or that there's something more to it. Just because something is not in our awareness, or in our life experience, doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist. Just because something goes against our way of thinking, doesn’t necessarily mean it’s wrong. Our reality is created by what we’re focusing on and the meaning we give it. The meaning we give it is influenced by our beliefs. The kicker is, many of our beliefs aren't even our own. They are beliefs we took on from our family, friends, teachers, religious doctrines, and society in general. When someone challenges your beliefs, instead of automatically getting upset, or offended, question where your belief comes from. Is it yours? Do you actually believe it 100%? Could there be a few % of wiggle room that allows for further exploration? The Earth was known to be flat - until Aristotle and Eratosthenes contended that, from their observations, the Earth is a sphere. Galileo was charged with heresy by the Catholic Church for claiming that the Earth revolves around the sun. This countered the posture of the church which maintained that the sun and other planets revolve around the Earth. Dr. Ignaz Semmelweis, who discovered the importance of hand washing between patients and the cleaning of medical equipment, was ousted and ignored. Doctors and surgeons did not incorporate these practices until the late 1800’s. What was believed to be reality was changed by those who challenged it, by those who took us outside of the box. The egg — for years there have been arguments over whether it’s healthy or not, and whether it’s the white or the yolk that’s better for you. Then there’s pasteurized milk versus unpasteurized milk. Dare I mention the debate on vaccines? Whenever we read or refer to a scientific study, it’s important to consider if it’s looking at the bigger picture or is it just focusing on one aspect? Who paid for that study? Is it peer-reviewed? What are other similar studies saying? Even with the news, are they giving you the facts so that you can construct your own opinion, or are they pushing an agenda? Are they telling you what to believe? And then there's social media - from those who actually know what they're taking about based on their own experience to those who are there for the vanity clicks and are spouting whatever will draw people to their posts. It’s so incredibly important to question. It’s why we have critical thinking skills in the first place. For those who rely so heavily on science, it’s important to remember that science isn’t fixed. It’s always changing as there are new discoveries. Since I deal with the non-physical, I’m often countered with, “According to science, that can’t be true.” I simply say, “Science hasn’t caught up yet.” I’m not negating the importance of science by any means. Science requires curiosity and the willingness to challenge standing beliefs through new observations. Science definitely has its place, it’s just not the be-all end-all. We are all experiencing life in different ways. We see it through our predisposed lens of limited understanding. How I see things is different from how you do. How I have experienced the world is different from how you have. The cool thing is, we can always change the lens. It’s all about being curious, expanding, stretching beyond our comfort zone and outside of our box of knowledge. We aren’t aware of what we’re not aware of until we’re aware of it. Even with awareness, we get to decide what that means to us. The next time you’re in a disagreement over whatever the topic may be, hear them out. That doesn’t mean that you have to agree with them. It’s helpful to see things from another perspective. I know many of my beliefs have changed and evolved over time. That’s what we’re meant to do as a species, evolve. Heart Hugs, Adrienne :) I happened to see a clip the other day, from 1997, where Oprah defended her decision to interview with Ellen Degeneres. Ellen coming out as gay, on national television, was a pivotal and historical moment at that time. This clip caused me to really stop and pause and replay. The audience member couldn’t understand how Oprah could consider herself a Christian and yet support homosexuality. Oprah responded: “Well, I have a different view of Christian than you do, o.k. The God I serve doesn't care whether you're tall or short or whether you were born black, or Asian, or gay. So, that's just a difference of belief and I don't expect to change your belief today…” Oprah followed this by saying that she was late to the show because she’d been arguing with someone in the makeup room who proclaimed that all gays would go to Hell, and by her supporting them, she would too. This idea is one that completely confounds me - threatening others with damnation so that they fall into line with your belief system. I think people forget that the Bible was not written by Jesus himself and that it was heavily edited. Isn’t it interesting how the Gospel of Mary Magdalene is nowhere to be found in any of the official versions of the Bible? Yes, it has good teachings that can guide us and add value to our lives, but it’s also been used as a means to control and manipulate people. If your religion, whatever it may be, fills you with fear and hatred of others who are different from you, that is dogma, not spirituality. Jesus preached love, not judgment. Oprah continued to respond to the audience member: “I take full responsibility for my going to Hell or Heaven. I take full responsibility and I feel that everybody who's concerned about me now going to Hell because I'm doing the Ellen Degeneres show - I think that you all should take that energy and try to create a little Heaven here on Earth for everybody.” Well said, Oprah! Can you imagine how much better the world would be if we each tried to create some Heaven on Earth? If we each connected to our own heart, our own Soul, and brought out our true qualities and gifts to share with the world instead of pointing fingers, shaming, creating division, and even lashing out with hate and violence? The video ends with Oprah stating: “See, I believe God created Ellen. I believe God did that. Ellen says she's gay. I believe God created her gay. I believe God did that.” The audience member countered: “You can't stand up there on that show, and in front of this whole American society, and say that you support that.” Oprah’s response: “I support her right to be who she thinks she is.” And, mic drop. I was amazed at Oprah’s strength and how she maintained her stance. I found her very inspiring. I was also moved by the audience member who nearly cried as she challenged Oprah on her decision. I had empathy for her - not because she believed the Bible and the interpretation that all gays and people who support them will go to Hell, but because she was having one of her core beliefs questioned. Let me tell you, that’s shaky ground for the ego. As humans, we tend to take on our beliefs as our identity. The ego will defend its identity tooth and nail. But, you see, beliefs change. We’re meant to grow and expand and level up, so to speak. If you were to take away your identity of being Christian (or whatever belief system you hold), would you cease to exist? I'd like you to picture a bicycle wheel. Think of all of the different religions as spokes which connect to the wheel frame (Source). There is not one or two spokes, there are many. Most people believe that there is a Creator - we just label it by different names and honor it in different ways. Go back to that vision of the bicycle wheel and compare it with humankind. All races, genders, sexual preferences, religious preferences, and political preferences are all spokes of the wheel of humanity. Each spoke is of equal importance and value to the entirety of the wheel. Each spoke has its place in the wheel of life. Wouldn’t it be a more enjoyable ride if we’d stop trying to break off the spokes we don’t agree with? If you would like to watch the video clip mentioned above, you can find it here. Heart Hugs, Adrienne :)
“The real difficulty is to overcome how you think about yourself.” - Maya Angelou Take a moment to think about the following questions: Who is the person you are the hardest on? Who is the person that takes the brunt of your criticism? Who is the person you talk down to the most? In most cases, that person is yourself. It's that critical inner voice that gets really loud from time to time - that can be so harsh, so demeaning, so defeating, so…well… critical. We wouldn’t even dream of speaking to a child or a person we love with that tone of voice, yet we allow it to live rent-free in our head. How can we feel good about ourselves if our thoughts are telling us we’re not worthy, or we’re a failure, or no one could possibly love us the way we are? We make a mistake and that voice lambasts us. We try to change our life for the better, but that voice tells us that we can’t or that it’s safer to stay in our misery. We want to go for our dreams, but that voice assures us that they’re impossible and we don’t have the capacity to achieve them. The problem lies in giving credence to that voice. Our thoughts play a massively important role in how we feel, perceive, and act. What we have to keep in mind is that our critical inner voice isn't always our own. Some of those ‘voices’ come from family, teachers, friends, neighbors, religious institutions, the media, and our culture. We internalize those external “voices” (thoughts, beliefs, perspectives) and without realizing it, think that they are our own. In a society that seems to be more and more vanity-driven, it can be really challenging to come back to and stay true to ourselves. How many people base their worth on their success? On their physical appearance? On the number of followers and likes that they have? If we don’t dress, look, act, speak, or believe a certain way - how can we be liked or accepted? To not feel liked or accepted feels terrifying and that’s when our survival instincts kick in. The ego will do its best to help us survive, but that’s often misguided. The ego believes that if you maintain the status quo, all will be well. Externally it may seem that way, but internally you’ll feel unhappy, stuck, or empty. I love Brené Brown’s statement that “The opposite of belonging is fitting in.” When we do our best to fit in, we are giving up valuable aspects of ourselves. We are not being true to our Soul essence - our real and true self. You came into this human experience to be and express who you are. You’re nothing short of amazing, so why do you allow that critical voice to make you feel like shit? Why do you allow it to dim your light? Your life is yours - will you allow it to be ruled by other’s beliefs, projections, or expectations? Your Soul knows its inherent self-worth. I find it fascinating that when I catch my critical inner voice going off on me, I’ll check in with my Soul and ask if she feels that way too. I can feel in my heart that that’s not the case. This lets me know that I have some work to do. The mind can think and rationalize, but it’s the heart who really knows. We may not be able to completely shut off that critical inner voice, but we can certainly turn it down and we can challenge it. When that voice gets loud - pay attention. What is it saying to you? Is it even your “voice?” Does what it’s saying feel good to you? If it doesn’t feel good, if it doesn’t feel freeing or expansive - it’s time to change thoughts. When your critical voice tells you that you can’t do x, y, or z, you can respond with “watch me” and start taking action in the direction you want to go. When the voice says, “See, it’s impossible!” - you pivot to where possibilities lie. When it insists on certain “truths” that make you feel terrible about yourself, know that those are lies. Truth with a capital ‘T,’ as in core truths, doesn’t hurt. I can’t remember where I picked up this phrase over the years, but it’s been a game changer for me: “It’s none of your business what other people think of you.” I would add that it is your business what you think of yourself. No matter how ingrained a belief system is, it can always be changed. You get to decide how you feel and what you think about yourself and only you can do the work to get yourself there. Heart hugs, Adrienne :) Have you ever felt stuck? I’m talking about the quicksand kind of stuck. Where you feel like no matter how much you try to get yourself out of it, you just sink deeper in. You see other people walking along the path happily heading to where they want to be going and you’re just there - stuck. Maybe you’re stuck in a job you hate, stuck in debt, stuck in an unhappy relationship, stuck being single, or stuck in depression. Whatever it is, you feel like you can’t get out of the cycle. You’ve probably tried or are still trying, yet you feel like you’re just spinning your wheels. Does this sound familiar?
Going back to the quicksand example, you might be waiting for someone to pull you out. You might already be resigned to this being your fate and that’s where you’re going to stay. The mere idea of getting out and back onto the path you want to go down can seem overwhelming or even downright impossible. The more you struggle and resist, the deeper and faster you sink. You might even start telling yourself that it’s just how life is going to be for you. Or, maybe, the voice in your head has convinced you that the Universe doesn’t care about you because you’re not lovable or worthy or acceptable enough to be on the path leading to your dreams, to the life you really want. When you intend to get unstuck, the Universe will throw you a line - it may come in the form of a branch, a rope, a hiking pole, or maybe another person. Where you have to be careful is how you judge the form the help comes in. If you think that a branch won’t pull you out, you may end up ignoring it and feeling upset that this wasn’t the help you expected - the help you so desperately prayed for. You might be waiting for a superhero to come and rescue you. Unlike how the fairy tales and comic books assured us, the likelihood of that is pretty low. In truth, you have to be your own superhero. You have to save yourself. You have to use your inner strength, wisdom, and determination to use the tools at your disposal to get yourself unstuck. Usually when we feel stuck, we think it’s because of our circumstances - that it’s due to what’s going on outside of us. While the external can be a contributing factor, it’s more about what’s going on internally. It comes down to the thoughts we’re thinking, the perspectives we hold - how we see life, as well as the stories we’re telling ourselves. If you feel like you’re not worthy of more in your life, you’ll stay stuck. If you feel like life hates you and you hate it right back, you’ll stay stuck. If you continually beat yourself up for getting stuck in the first place and not getting out, you’ll stay stuck. If you feel you suck at life, you’ll stay stuck. If you feel like the odds are stacked against you and there’s nothing you can do about it, you’ll stay stuck. If you feel like your dreams are impossible for someone like you, you’ll stay stuck. If you believe what other people tell you about how you should just stay where you are or that you can’t change, guess what? You’ll stay stuck. Just as it takes small movements to free yourself from quicksand, it takes small action steps to free yourself from your cycle of stuckness. Not sure where to start? Here are some ideas:
Just as it’s possible to free yourself from quicksand, it’s also very possible to get out of your stuckness and back onto the path of the life you dream of. Back onto a path of the life you choose to live. If that's you, know that I'm cheering you on! Heart hugs, Adrienne :) She was wearing a white hat similar to mine. I held the door open for her as we both exited the store. We started conversing. She even asked if I had a moment to chat as we were talking. I marveled at that. She told me she’s almost 91, her husband is 85, and their kids are in their 60’s. She used to work in a factory and loves to line dance. This woman was very vibrant - spunky. She said that she keeps moving and that she can’t understand why their sons think they have to care for her since she’s mobile and can drive just fine. She talked about how her husband watches the 6:30 news and that it’s so depressing since there’s nothing they can do about it. She asked me my name and told me that hers is Velma - “a real old school name.” The only Velma I’d ever come across was the one in Scooby Doo. I LOVED meeting her. Our little exchange of several minutes brightened and set the tone for the rest of my day. It reminded me of how very precious face-to-face human connection is. She did not look her age, nor did she act it if you follow the ridiculous presumptions that society tends to hold of its elders.
Aging is a natural part of the human experience. When we’re younger, we can’t even imagine that we’ll ever get old. As we age, we tend to look for ways to slow that process down. Think of the multibillion dollar beauty industry. We even go as far as saying things like, "50 is the new 30." Sadly, our society (at least in the U.S.) lacks the care and respect for our most senior members. It almost seems like once you reach a certain decade, you’re written off. How sad is that? Our elders hold a lifetime of experiences and wisdom which is mostly lost on our younger generations. Even though our bodies do age, I think there’s a part of us that will always be a kid at heart. I remember when my Grandpa was passing in his early 90’s. He told me that he still felt like a young man on the inside, but that his body just couldn’t keep up with him. His wife is nearing 99 years of age at the moment. She amazes me in that she once again found a zest for life. She went from solely consuming Ensure to eating several meals a day - on her own. She also insisted on changing the color of her wardrobe to brighter colors. Every time I see her, she has her pretty pink lipstick on. I have been very fortunate to meet some of the most amazing role models of what “old age” can be like. I have a dear friend, Ruth, who was my yoga teacher. She was teaching yoga in her 70’s. She is now 100. She still walks on her own, though sometimes with the help of a walker. She lives in her own apartment in a retirement community. She’ll cook meals for herself. She goes grocery shopping. She swears that all of those years of yoga kept her in great shape for reaching a century. I was also graced to meet Harriotte, a busy practicing psychotherapist who would head to PIlates each week and walk her dog daily. When she retired about two years after I met her, she was in her early 90's. I have also met women who have started new careers much later in life and are absolutely flourishing. Aging doesn’t have to be the end-all. It also doesn’t have to be a battle. From what I’ve observed - staying active, having a good mindset, treating your body well, and finding the daily joys and your zest for life can bring about better longevity. Life isn’t over once you retire. It’s a whole new chapter. Aging most definitely does not need to equal invisible, useless, or irrelevant. It is high time we honor our elders and honor ourselves as we age. Every single day is precious and every single soul is precious. Our time on this planet, no matter how long or short, is valuable. If we want to live our life to the fullest, I think Velma hit the nail on the head, “just keep moving.” Heart hugs, Adrienne :) It was the late 1980’s and there I was participating in the citywide spelling bee. As a middle school student, I remember how nervous and uncomfortable I felt under the stage lights. Never mind the gymnasium full of chairs seated with family and friends of the contestants. We wore numbers and when it was our turn, we’d go up and receive the word that would determine if we were moving on to the next round or dejectedly leaving the stage. I remember the words were somewhat easy in the beginning - like a free pass or warm up. As more and more of my fellow participants were buzzed out and left the stage, I anticipated what my next word would be. I had been doing pretty well thus far.
Up to the mic went my nemesis. He was from my old school. We were always competing with each other for the best grades. I constantly felt like I had to prove myself, especially since I was “just a girl.” Needless to say, we didn’t get along all that well. I could see his back as he stood in front of the microphone. I heard the announcer give him his word. Quickly and confidently he spelled out l-i-b-a-r-y. The buzzer sounded. He’d forgotten the first "r." It was now down to just a handful of us. I’d always enjoyed spelling and always did well on my tests. It was fun for me to get a 100%, an A, or A+ if there were bonus words, and the sticker. Receiving a sticker was the absolute best. I was an avid reader, so I had a decent vocabulary. I knew the basic spelling rules - i before e except after c (except when it isn’t). I remember we had practice bees and there were lists to study. It was pretty much a role of the die as to which words you would get. I really wondered, what would fate have in store for me that night? After what seemed like an eternity, my number was once again called. Back up I went to the microphone. The gym was quiet. The announcer gave me my word. I asked him to repeat it. Then, I panicked. I’d never heard of this word before in my entire life. Each time he said the word, it sounded like a different pronunciation. I can’t remember if I asked for the definition, but it wouldn’t have mattered much. It seemed like there were at least 5 different ways this word could possibly be spelled. Could it be m-o-n-o-c-t-n-o-u-s? Or was it m-o-n-o-c-t-e-n-o-u-s? Maybe m-o-n-a-c-h-n-o-u-s? Then there’s m-o-n-a-t-e-n-u-s or would that be m-o-n-a-t-e-n-o-u-s? To this day, I have no idea what I spelled out, but the buzzer let me know that it was not correct. I was baffled. Jeez, my word was so hard! I left the stage feeling deflated, even though I should’ve felt proud that I was one of the last few standing. Monotonous - dull, tedious, and repetitious; lacking in variety and interest. As in boring, banal, mundane, and mind-numbing. The polar opposite of varied, diversified, exciting, and interesting. Monotonous was the word I misspelled and then stored in the back of my memory. It wasn’t until a few decades later that I really thought about the word that cost me the spelling bee. It was then that I realized just how important that word actually is for me. You see, how I’ve chosen to live my life is the exact opposite of monotony. I’m constantly trying new things, learning things that are outside of my comfort zone (hello tech), and living in other cultures and places because I love diversity and stretching myself through new experiences. What I detest the most is feeling bored. In fact, it’s rare that I ever even feel that way. If I start to feel bored with some aspect of my life, I know it’s time for some change. I can’t stand it when everything is the same and there’s little to no excitement. Life has so much to offer that there is no time for monotony. As I look over my life thus far, I can identify different themes that have come up, such as my infamous spelling word. I see them almost like bread crumbs that have helped lead me closer to my true self. I now joke that even if I had known the spelling of monotonous, it’s so against my nature that my subconscious would’ve had me misspell it anyway. I can just imagine it: I step up to the mic, I hear the word "monotony" and then I spell it m-o-N-O-T-in-me ;) Heart hugs, Adrienne :) I was going non-stop and I could feel my plate getting heavier and heavier. I’d eat something (complete a task) and something else would appear. Things just kept piling up on my plate and the more I’d say, "I have too much on my plate," the heavier it all felt and the more it would stress me out, causing me a literal stomach ache. Then, I realized that I have a choice to take it one bite at a time instead of focusing on the entire plate. I also get a say as to what ends up on my plate. There are foods (tasks) that I don’t want, that aren’t good for me, or I’m not ready to try yet that could come off of my plate. As people try to offer me more servings for my plate, I can simply say, "no, thank you." Some of this "food" can be stored in the fridge to be “eaten” another day. Some of it will rot if I don’t take deal with it now and I know that that’s where my attention needs to be. How about your own plate? How stacked is it? How heavy is it? How balanced is it with food you enjoy and food you have to force down? Are there bits on your plate that are rotting away? Are there portions that you don't even want to taste and put off eating, but once you finally do - you realize they don't taste that bad after all? I realized that I don’t want a plate heaped with all kinds of things. I do not desire a plate that is overwhelming and feels like I'll never finish. I absolutely don't want a plate that makes me nauseous just looking at it. I want something more balanced, more appeasing to my palate. There are certain things that I’ll still have to "eat" until I can find someone else who enjoys them and will gladly take them off my plate for me. I also recognize that there are times when I need to take some of my portion and serve (delegate) it to others. Life is like an all-you-can-eat buffet. There are a lot of options to choose from and the amount of food seems endless. The question is, do you really want to spend your entire day just "eating?" It’s not healthy to put all of your energy into solely “eating.” It's so important to step away from the plate and rest, to exercise, to do something fun. Take time to just stop - to meditate, to get out in Nature, to connect with people and have a great conversation. We all know that overconsuming real food isn't healthy for our body and can lead to physical issues and disease. Yet, how often do we overconsume our metaphorical plates? You have the choice to stop force-feeding yourself. You also don't have to continually serve yourself so much of what other people are telling you to eat. We will all have things on our plate that we'll need to "eat" whether we like it or not. We just need to make sure that we're balancing our diet and that there's food on our plate that we thoroughly enjoy. We need to remember to take breaks from our plates and to engage in other activities that bring us joy and soul nourishment. When that plate does become overwhelming, and you're starting to feel anxiety, go back to taking one bite at a time. Then, give yourself the opportunity to really take a look at your plate and figure out how to make it lighter and more appealing. Bon appétit, Adrienne :)
Like many people, a big theme in my life is freedom - freedom to be myself, to live where I want and how I want. Freedom from oppressive thoughts and beliefs. Freedom to share my gifts and to live life instead of life living me. Freedom from the emotional pain and heaviness of past experiences and trauma. The freedom to make choices, to respond instead of react. When we are caught up in beliefs that don’t serve us, we have lost some of our freedom. When we stay stuck in the past, or in victim mentality, we have lost a part of our freedom. When we refuse to feel our uncomfortable emotions and stuff them down instead, we have lost some more of our freedom. When we let fear dictate our decisions, you guessed it, we have lost a portion of our freedom. There is so much that happens at the subconscious level that can cause restrictions to our freedom which also impacts our happiness. It takes awareness and it takes some concentrated effort to begin to free the mind, the heart, and the soul. Ignorance may be bliss, but it is not liberation. Most of us haven’t really been taught how to handle our emotions. We’re told to stuff them down, to stop overreacting, or that we’re somehow bad or less than if we feel a certain way. Sometimes the feelings are just so big and painful, we don’t know what to do with them and instead will use t.v., gaming, social media scrolling, alcohol, or other substances to numb out the pain and discomfort. Many people have no idea that these emotions can get trapped in the body leading to all kinds of problems. Trapped emotional blockages can literally weigh you down, cause issues in your relationships, keep you stuck, lead to physical ailments, and or attract more of what you don’t want into your life. Did you know that the ego will actually take the energy from your emotional blockages and build what is called a heart-wall? This wall is the ego’s way of protecting you from emotional pain. Sounds like a great idea, right? Except it doesn’t work that way. We still feel the pain and can become closed off to love and joy. Add on top of that, what we hold attracts more of the same. As you can see, what we refuse to feel, doesn’t just disappear. It stays in the body and causes disruptions to our well-being. A newer release I’ve been seeing recently is what I call an emotion body. It looks like an energetic body that’s made out of one emotional frequency. It is formed by pulling in energy from emotional blockages that are held throughout the body. Whereas the heart-wall is made up of many different kinds of trapped emotions, the emotion body is just one frequency. An example would be an emotion body of anger. This anger body draws from the emotional blockages of anger that you’re already holding. An upside is that when we clear out the whole emotion body in one go, it clears out all of those blockages, whereas the heart-wall takes some time to drop since it’s made up of different emotional blockage frequencies. What’s key to understand is that if you’re holding a lot of anger, you’re going to attract more anger, or situations that cause anger, into your life. That’s one of the reasons why it’s important to work on clearing out this energy. Plus, you actually do feel lighter in the process. Another release I’ve been seeing more of is ancestral wounding. This is where someone goes through something so traumatic that they trap an emotional frequency along with specific belief codes surrounding the trauma. Unlike an inherited trapped emotion, where it’s hit or miss as to who inherits it, everyone related to the person at that time and all future generations of that bloodline take on this emotional blockage and belief codes. The clearing for this is very profound as it impacts past, present, and future generations. If you are finding this interesting and would like to learn more, I have a free mini-master course, Emotional Blockages 101, where you can learn more about these energies, how to work with your emotions so you don’t trap them in the first place, as well as what to do with the blockages you already have. Our emotions are such an integral part of being human, yet we’re pretty much left on our own to figure out what to do with them. Our emotions aren’t bad, they’re just energy that we need to learn how to work with. That’s what spurred me to create Emotional Blockages 101 - to provide some insight into our emotions and their blockages so we can learn how to handle them and process them. Don’t we all deserve our freedom? Don’t you deserve to feel lighter and not be weighed down by your past? Heart hugs, Adrienne :)
“It was only a sunny smile, and little it cost in the giving, but like the morning light it scattered the night and made the day worth living.” - F. Scott Fitzgerald I was having a really bad day. Everything was setting me off. I felt angry, frustrated, irritated, pissed off, and ready to lash out if one more thing came up. Life was not going my way in the slightest and it was driving me into despair. I was sitting in my car waiting on a red light. As the crosswalk sign turned green, I noticed a man walking from my right. As he passed in front of my car, he turned his head, looked at me while making eye contact, and had the biggest smile on his face. Immediately my energy shifted. It was as if all of the irritation, frustration, and despair just melted away. That man shared a most precious gift with me - his warm, happy, friendly smile. A smile that beamed from the inside out. It’s one of those moments I will never forget. Our smile is so powerful - it can shift our own energy, it can shift the energy in others. It can’t be just any smile though, it has to be one that’s connected to the heart - a real, genuine smile. The best are smiles that just beam out from us. Fake or forced smiles don’t cut it. A smirk doesn’t cut it. Smiles used to cover our fear or embarrassment don’t cut it. In order to smile more, we need to get in touch with our soul’s joy. What actually brings joy to your heart and a smile to your face? For me, it’s seeing something beautiful in nature, it’s hearing the laughter of kids (or adults acting like kids) playing and having fun, it’s watching a show that’s touching or makes me laugh. When I go into meditation and connect with my soul self, I smile. When someone does something kind, I achieve something, or I feel fulfillment, I smile. When I’m happy to see someone or it’s a sunny day, I smile. What are the sources of your soul smiles? Did any of the above images happen to bring a smile to your face? A smile from another warms the heart. It’s one of the loveliest gifts we can give each other and what does it cost us? A smile is presence, it’s sharing our joy. Again, we're not talking about forced smiles. It takes connecting to your heart, to your soul, to tap into the best smiles. Babies and kids do this pretty effortlessly. We adults need to work at it a bit due to our conditioning. A smile can be powerful medicine - it helps relax the body, puts us in a higher vibratory state, and helps keep our mood elevated. I challenge you to find your soul smile today - and let it beam. Heart hugs, Adrienne :)
“Someday. That's a dangerous word. It's really just code for 'never.'” - Roy Miller (Tom Cruise) from Knight and Day The above quote, from the movie Knight and Day, has stuck with me for over a decade. ‘Someday’ puts our desires far into the future - out of reach. They’re on our radar, but the likelihood of them happening is pretty low. ‘Someday, maybe…’ is even worse in terms of it ever happening. In my 20's and 30's, instead of chasing down a career and building a 401K, I traveled - all over the world. I remember people telling me that I should focus on work, and saving my money, so I could set myself up for retirement and then I could think about traveling. I hated that idea. My thought process was:
Sometimes our dreams, goals, and desires may seem so big, lofty, or unachievable that we feel safe saying we’ll get to them someday. My friends, someday isn’t going to just fall into your lap. You have to call it in. You have to give your dream focus, put energy into it, put intent behind it, and take action. Even consistent baby steps will get you there. Isn't it time to dust off those bucket lists? If you don’t have one, it’s time to write one. Stop putting it off and start taking the steps to get you to your dream. As an example, let’s say that one of your dreams is you’ve always wanted to travel to an exotic location. To keep it from the realm of someday/never, you have to start taking action now. You can simply start by:
We have one life that is meant for living. LIVING - not hoping that someday things will fall into our lap, that one day we’ll accomplish what we’ve been dreaming of, or that someday we’ll be happier. No matter how big your dream is, if you want it, then go for it. Just don’t say, “Someday I’ll… “ Change that to: “There is a day in my near future where I am..." Or, “Soon, I will…” Or, “In 1 (3, 5) years I am…" Or, simply, "I am ..." Here’s to taking action! Heart Hugs, Adrienne :)
There was a time in my life when feeling happy was physically painful. It actually became one of the major catalysts for my transformational growth journey. I decided there had to be more to life than the comfort of misery. By that point, I wasn’t even sure what it meant to feel happy. I’d done all the things that were supposed to make me happy, yet all I felt was emptiness. If I did feel happy, it was pretty short-lived. I’d achieved what I was told would bring me happiness, so why wasn’t I happy? It became my mission to figure it out. In this post, I’m going to share with you three key points I’ve learned over the years that have helped me understand what brings about real happiness. 1. Projecting happiness into the future keeps it there. Do you ever catch yourself thinking or saying, I will be happy when… I get a promotion I meet the love of my life I pass the exam I make a ton of money I get the new car I win the lottery I make it to the weekend (Insert yours here) So, if you don’t get those things, will you not be happy? Or what if you do get them and the happiness is short-lived? Will you be happier when you get an even nicer car, a better promotion, or a new love? Will you put off your happiness while waiting on external things to happen or fall into place? By projecting your happiness into the future, you’re robbing yourself of the joy you could be living now. 2. Happiness isn’t about the externals - it’s about what lights you up on the inside. If you believe that something will bring you happiness, you need to ask yourself if it's to make your heart or your ego happy. Real happiness is not about appeasing the ego. Would you rather have a sense of happiness that is quick-lived or joy that lingers in your heart? Happiness is the small and big delights in the day to day. For me, it’s
"Now and then it’s good to pause in our pursuit of happiness and just be happy." - Guillaume Apollinaire 3. Instead of waiting for happiness to make its way to you, or you to it, incorporate it into your daily life. Find those simple joys that light up your heart, that bring a smile to your face. We often look at happiness as if it’s some goal we must reach, when in reality it’s our birthright that we can experience on a daily basis. If there’s one thing I’ve learned it’s that to feel real happiness, it has to resonate with your soul. Take some time to reflect on what brings your soul joy. The exercise below is quite helpful as you navigate the pursuit of your own happiness. Exercise:
Sending you a heart hug, Adrienne :) As 2023 is winding down to its end, I’ve been taking time to reflect on the past year and where I want my focus to be in 2024. To be honest, 2023 was a freaking hard year. I felt so lost, so many things didn’t work out or fell through, and there were a lot of disappointments. I’ve been feeling so incredibly frustrated because my life isn’t how I want it to be (yet). My first thought was “ugh — another year wasted!” Then, I made a list of the main events from 2023 and found that my year was far from wasted and was actually full of growth and shifts. Some of my highlights include:
Another thing I came to realize is that whenever I got out of my head and heeded those inner nudges, I found the inspiration and motivation I needed. As I look back on this year, instead of berating myself, I recognize that I have every reason to pat myself on the back and congratulate myself for all of the effort I’ve put in, as well as the personal growth I’ve accomplished. How about you? What are some of the highlights from your year? What challenges have you overcome? What can you pat yourself on the back for? What are some areas you know you still need to work on in the coming year? As I thought about 2024, instead of focusing on setting resolutions (that are the best of intentions, but don’t seem to get too far), I wanted to look at what energy I’d be bringing into the new year. I began to focus on what determined action I’d be taking and what determined progress I’d be making. Don’t you just love those terms - determined action and determined progress? I have a pretty huge goal for 2024. I know that I will put everything I have into it instead of just trying it out and hoping for the best. I will visualize, I will take action, and I will clear out any self-sabotage that’s standing in my way. I will do what it takes to achieve this dream that’s been on my mind and in my heart for years. How about you? Is there something you want to create in your life? Is there a trip you want to take? Maybe there’s a class you’d like to try? Is there something that you’ve been wanting, but have put off due to circumstances or not knowing how to go about it? I encourage you to set your sights on it and in 2024 take the determined action, so you can make your determined progress, and achieve your goal. Wishing you a beautiful rest of the holiday season and a most wonderful new year, Adrienne :) As a kid, I absolutely hated taking naps. As an adult, I miss those days. I was lucky to experience siestas while I lived in Mexico in the 90’s. I would student teach all morning, go back to the casa where I was staying for lunch, which is the main meal of the day, and then it was siesta time. Everyone in the house did this. Whether they slept or watched tv, it was a time to rejuvenate before heading back to work or school. Sadly, the siesta isn’t a very common practice these days. We live in a world where it’s go-go-go all the time. When we feel sleepy during the day, instead of taking a short rest, the go-to is usually caffeine. When we don’t get enough rest we can feel scattered, stressed, moody, have a foggy brain, be more easily triggered, be less productive, and our immune system can be impacted - and not in a good way. “Instead of asking, 'Have I worked hard enough to deserve a rest?' I've started asking, 'Have I rested enough to do my most loving, meaningful work?’” -Nicola Jane Hobbs I think this quote provides a great re-frame for prioritizing rest. We all have a million things to do, but if we can’t take care of ourselves then how can we show up fully in our life? Why is it that we don’t allow ourselves time to rest? Why can’t rest be included on the must-do lists we have running each day? I’m not saying to carve out an hour - though if you can, that’s great. Even 15 minutes to just decompress would be better than not at all. Use that time to lie down and close your eyes, to relax, or sit comfortably and meditate. If you can’t leave work, try getting outside and finding a bench to sit and relax on. The point is to give yourself some time to let your body slow down, to disengage your brain, and to take a break from the screens, notifications, emails, and scrolling. "You often feel tired not because you've done too much, but because you’ve done too little of what sparks a light in you." - Alexander Den Heijer Another way to look at this is that we over-program ourselves with everything we feel we have to do and not enough of what we want to do. Life isn’t meant to be oppressive. There are so many ways you can incorporate some joy into your life on the daily. What lights you up? What helps you feel more energized? What are you passionate about? How can you incorporate what sparks a light in you into any given day? “You should sit in meditation for twenty minutes every day – unless you're too busy; then you should sit for an hour.” - Dr. Sukhraj Dhillon I think the above quote can also apply to rest. As the holidays approach, we’ll be busier and likely more stressed which is all the more reason to prioritize some time to rest. Resting is self-care. It allows us to fill our cups so we can share instead of depleting from a deficit. What do you do when your phone battery is low? You charge it. You are way more important and valuable than your phone, but are you taking care of your battery? If you are too busy to take a quick siesta, make sure you incorporate into your day something that lights you up, that energizes your soul. Take some you-time so you can be more present, more refreshed. It’s a gift that gives to everyone. Heart hugs, Adrienne :)
Something you may not know about me is that I love K-dramas (Korean dramas). They are so good. I usually can’t sit through any US show for more than 5 minutes, but K-dramas are full of twists, turns, surprises, and emotional roller coasters. I recently watched one called Daily Dose of Sunshine which is currently on Netflix. It’s about a nurse who transfers to the psychiatry department. We are brought into a world of those dealing with mental health issues from panic attacks to self-harm, depression to schizophrenia. It’s not just about those in the psych ward, but others who are out in the world trying to live their daily lives while caring for their mental health. This drama addresses the denial, the prejudices, and the heartbreak that those with mental health issues, as well as their family and loved ones, experience. The nurse ends up in a psych ward herself for a while due to the suicide of one of her patients - offering viewers another perspective. This drama was beautifully done. It’s well-scripted, well-acted, and definitely worth a watch.
We need more awareness and compassion for those who are struggling with mental health issues and for those around them who are trying to support them. Thankfully, these days, mental health is starting to get the attention that it deserves and is much needed. Decades ago, it was so taboo to even think about seeing a “shrink.” I probably would’ve been a lot happier and handled things way better had I found some help, but the idea of that somehow becoming a stigma against all of my hard work and achievements kept me from taking that step. I handled it all on my own, the best I could manage. It wasn’t until I ended up in a specialist’s office for ocular migraines that it was suggested that I see a psychotherapist and that doctor happened to know one of the best. This was about 2 years or so after my gifts opened up in Sedona. I thought it would be good to get a professional’s opinion on whether I was crazy or not. I figured she’d gently let me know if I was delusional as I explained my work with the Angels. It was quite the opposite. Harriotte was one of the best gifts the Universe could’ve given me. She helped me see that I wasn’t crazy and that I don’t have to go through so much alone. She helped me see where I had to reframe my thinking. She saw my Light - which in turn made me want to see it too. Back to the K-drama. As I watched the episodes unfold, I could resonate on so many levels with the emotions and difficulties the actors were portraying. I started to do some reflection and introspection and I had some great breakthroughs that were perspective shifting. One realization I had was around self-worth. As someone who struggled for decades with low self-esteem, it all of a sudden seemed so obvious: there is no such thing as self-worth. There is no living being who is more or less worthy than another. We are all inherently worthy, yet we tend to base and scale our worth on others' expectations and perceptions - how many followers one has, how much money one makes, how much success one has, to name a few. I realized that it’s not even about whether we’re worthy or not, it’s about meaning. It’s not even a question (though we do tend to question it) whether our life has meaning - every life has meaning. We, as we exist, are meaning-full and our existence has meaning. There’s no scale to judge yourself by, unless you choose to lean on one. You have meaning, your life has meaning, and that is enough. The fun is in figuring out what that meaning is for you, what you can contribute and share with others. Another realization I had was about growing pains. We have them when we’re physically growing, but we also have them throughout our life as we face challenges and situations that either force us to grow or are opportunities for growth. No one wants to be in pain, but it is there to get our attention, it can teach us something, and it needs to be processed and released. Since I can feel other people's pain empathically, I just want to take that suffering away from them. I want to help them return to a state of feeling good or at least better. It doesn’t work that way. I’m not here to take away my clients' pain, I’m here to help them move through it more quickly and easily than if they tried to go through it on their own. This realization gave me more clarity on the work that I’m putting out into the world and it unexpectedly, and gratefully, took some of the weight off my shoulders. In the drama, they suggested to the lead character that she keep a compliment journal. Through this exercise, she discovered that complimenting herself was a lot more rewarding than receiving a compliment from others. We’re usually so hard on ourselves - judging, criticizing what we did or didn’t do on any given day. How often do we cheer ourselves on? I’ve started putting this into practice. It’s actually an awesome exercise. How often do you compliment yourself? Can you find at least one thing to compliment yourself on each day? It can be on the most trivial things or the ones that you feel proud of. This exercise helps us become less reliant on external compliments and gives us a stronger sense of self. Mental health is something we all should be paying attention to. What thoughts are you focusing on? Do they bring you peace or the opposite? Just as it’s important to feed your body healthy food, it’s equally important to feed your mind healthy thoughts. Are you immersed in the news or pulled into scrolling on your phone? What nourishment are you giving your mind that feels good and gives you a sense of joy or lightness? The last line of the drama states, “Each one of us is standing on the border between normal and abnormal.” Just as anyone can get physically ill, anyone can encounter mental health issues as well. Addressing our mental health and getting the help we may need - there is no shame in that.
P.S. I was listening to a playlist and this song by Lily Meola came up. I think it fits this blog post.
Sending you the biggest heart hug, Adrienne ☀️
One of the biggest questions we have is ‘What happens after death?’ Do we just disappear? Do we end up in Heaven or maybe Hell? There is plenty of evidence from mediums, people who have had near-death experiences, and peoples' very own personal experiences that our loved ones still continue to exist once they’ve left their physical form. One belief that many religions and ancient traditions hold is that the soul continues after death. Personally, I’ve been visited in my dream by my best friend after she passed away. I've felt my grandpa’s energy so strongly, like his energy intermingled with my cells for a moment, the day after he passed. I’ve delivered messages on behalf of the deceased. I’ve helped and watched many cross over. I’ve witnessed a squirrel die and then saw its energy pop up right next to its body. To me, there is no doubt that we continue on once we disconnect from our physical body. It’s also my belief that hell is a man-made creation, but that’s for a different post.
Today is Día de Muertos - Day of the Dead - a day when the souls of the deceased return among the living to visit with their loved ones. November 1st is dedicated to the souls of children and November 2nd is for adults. There are still towns and people in México who celebrate this pre-Hispanic tradition that morphed with Catholicism. They set up altars in their home, or at the cemetery, using candles, photos of those who have passed, and some kind of religious symbols - usually of the Virgen de Guadalupe. They also put out the deceased's favorite foods for them to enjoy, as well as toys, if it’s a child or alcohol for the adults. Traditional orange marigold flowers are used due to the belief that their scent and color help lead the departed back to their loved ones. Día de los Muertos isn’t about the absence of those who have passed on, it’s about celebrating and honoring their living presence. I know many of you reading this have experienced the passing of family, friends, or other people who are dear to you. Death is not easy for the living as we’re left to cope with the grief of loss of the physical. Honor those emotions and feelings. Give yourself a chance to feel and process them. When you feel ready, I invite you to create your own tradition to celebrate those who have passed on. Something I do on the deathdate of my best friend is I find a beautiful flower and toss it into a body of water - whether I’m near a lake, ocean, or pond at that time. It can be as simple or as grand as you’d like to make it. It's a beautiful way that allows us the time and presence so we can have that connection with our loved ones in spirit. Life should be a celebration - and death as well as it’s just our transition back home, it's not the end. I found the following short clip from Coco that shows an example of an altar:
Heart hugs, Adrienne :)
Volcanoes and I don’t have the best relationship. My first time climbing a volcano was in the 90’s in Ecuador. It was the Cotopaxi and I wasn’t told that I needed sunglasses to protect my eyes. Due to the snow and being on the equator, I ended up burning the corneas of my eyes. The optometrist said that my contact lenses saved my eyes from the tiny ice particles and possible blindness. Another volcano I climbed was Mt. Fuji in Japan. I had a really hard time due to altitude sickness and ended up with some physical ailments that took about a year to overcome. Then, there was the Villarica volcano in Chile. I almost lost my life on that one. That was the tipping point that helped me realize that maybe I shouldn’t be climbing volcanoes. Volcanoes tend to represent the duality of creation and destruction, death and rebirth. Myths are created around them, deities are associated with them. The legend of Popocatepetl and Iztaccíhuatl is one such story that is worth a read. The Izta actually does look like a woman lying down. Volcanoes can trigger earthquakes, tsunamis, mudflows, and pyroclastic flows. Pyroclastic flows and surges are the most dangerous as they are fast moving (as in 62-435 mph) hot (1800F) gas and volcanic matter. It’s what took out the people of Pompeii. I’ve been to Pompeii and warily stared at the still active Mt. Vesuvius. The largest active volcano is Mauna Loa on the Big Island of Hawaii - also a place I have visited. Within the last few years, volcanoes have started showing up in my dreams, or maybe I should say nightmares. I’m used to tornado dreams which signify for me that big change is coming. I’m still figuring out what the volcanoes mean for me. In general, they can signify a repressed emotion that, unless dealt with, may surge forward. Most typically, they represent repressed anger. They can also represent transformation. They can reflect the stress, anxiety, and upheavals of our waking life. If you find there’s a recurring theme to your dreams, it’s time to pay attention. My most recent volcanic adventure was last spring in Mexico. I woke up one morning to ashfall - like snowfall, but ash. Surprisingly, ash is really heavy and it gets EVERYWHERE. The Popocatepetl was way more active than usual. We wondered if an eruption was soon to follow. Translation: The Popo at 7am, this is why there's so much ash. Source: unknown I was staying at a place just inside the evacuation zone. The ash was no joke, it made it hard to breathe and hurt like no other when it got into your eyes. I was pretty shocked that the mask and goggles I ordered on Amazon showed up the very next day. I had a go-bag ready, and spent nights watching the live feed cameras as material ejected from the crater. If you’re caught in a pyroclastic flow, there's pretty much no escape. There was a point when I wondered, is this how I die? That sucked. I watched interviews of people who lived the closest and in the biggest danger zones. They’ve lived with the volcano their entire lives. One woman said in an interview that she didn’t know how they expected people to evacuate when the roads were covered in potholes and speed bumps. Other than a woman who worked at the place where I was staying (and insisted we were all going to die), everyone else just went about their daily lives. I got the following video on social media and laughed a ton of the stress away. Source: unknown Thankfully, el Popo quieted down. Hundreds of millions of people around the world live near or even on volcanoes. They are a terrifying, yet beautiful force of Nature. And, for some reason, have been an integral part of my adventures and life. Heart Hugs, Adrienne :) We don't need to worry 'cause when we fall, we know how to land When I first heard the song "Permission to Dance" (BTS), the above lyric really hit me. I thought, I know very well how to fall, but do I know how to land? I sure didn’t think so. One of the singers from BTS, Suga (민윤기), had spoken about this during an interview: “I’ve said several times that I’m afraid of falling, but not landing. And the difference between falling and landing is that landing means that you can take off again.” As someone who is used to falling, for me, landing meant either going SPLAT and face planting into misery or it meant the end. The end of a relationship, a failed project, an important missed opportunity - you name it. Seeing it as an opportunity to take off again wasn’t really in my vocabulary. My inner critic adamantly confirmed that with, "You’re right, you’re not resilient. You’ve been beaten down too many times. Just stay down…” The definition of resilience is the capacity to withstand or to recover quickly from difficulties. There are many kinds of resiliency: physical, mental, emotional, social, financial, job loss, divorce, failure - pretty much any area of life that can be challenging. Now, as someone who has felt like the least resilient person on the planet, I knew this was an area I needed to strengthen. I once heard a fellow student, during a class I was taking, comment on resilience and alchemy. She basically said that it’s not only about getting back up, but transforming into something greater. I began to wonder, how do we find or tap into our resiliency so that we can alchemize it? I learned that a big part of it is through awareness. You have to become aware that you actually are resilient - think of times where you’ve been resilient in the past. I made it to the top of Mt. Fuji while fighting altitude sickness which led to some physical issues after the fact. I made it up, and down, and recovered - there’s an example of resiliency. Think of how your body recovers from illness and trauma. Think of how you can find another job after being laid off or fired. Think of how you open yourself back up for love after a heart wrenching breakup. Think of how you pivot so you don’t give up on your dream. These are all examples of resilience. I figured out a little formula, that I call the 4Rs, for when I’m in a challenging situation that calls for resiliency:
The truth of the matter is we are way more resilient than we tend to believe. It’s an inner strength that we all have access to. Just as Nature is resilient, so are we. When we can tap into that resiliency we can navigate life’s challenges more easily. Let’s be honest, with as crazy as the world is right now, we need our resilience more than ever. There is another comment that Suga made in the interview that sums it all up perfectly: “So, no matter how desperate the situation is, if we choose landing instead of falling, choose not to give up, and just land, we’re ready to fly again.” Falling can be really scary, but at some point we will land and we will have that inner resilience to tap into to decide where we’ll go from there. If we can put our attention on landing instead of on the fact that we’re falling, we can direct our energy to harness what we learned and launch ourselves into something even greater. The next time you find yourself facing a big challenge, I invite you to focus on the landing, alchemize what you’ve learned from the situation, and use it as fuel to take off stronger and wiser so you can fly in the direction of your goals, dreams, and desires. Heart Hugs, Adrienne :) In the fall of last year, I saw an announcement for my 30 year high school reunion. I haven’t attended any past reunions and for some reason I really felt compelled to go to this one. In fact, I made up my mind to go. Then, the doubts started creeping in. How could I go? I had nothing to show for myself. I wasn’t married, didn’t have kids, the work I do is still considered “woo woo” in these parts - I felt like I’d be judged as a failure. I knew I’d have to do some serious re-framing of this mindset or I wouldn’t end up going. Plus, it made me feel like crap. I recognized that I was the one judging myself as a failure and would need to shift that. Thankfully, the Universe intervened in the form of an email. The subject line was ‘No more hiding your badassery.’ It was from Amber, from Woman Unleashed (I highly recommend that you check her out). Basically, she pointed out that we often censor our greatness. Society has told us (women) not to brag or boast or make others feel uncomfortable with our achievements. She’s right, why should we play small? Instead, let’s celebrate what we’ve accomplished. She shared a list of amazing things she’s achieved over the years and ended that list with “I am a badass.” I was really inspired and sat down to write my own list. Once I finished, I was really amazed - I’ve accomplished A LOT. Here are a few things from my list:
How could I think of myself as a failure when I look at the life I’ve lived and what I’ve been able to achieve? This list helped me shift my thinking and how I saw myself. The conventional life wasn’t for me. I’ve wanted to really explore and experience life, which I did and still do. This list gave me a confidence boost. It helped me see myself through a new lens. It helped me define success and failure in a new way. Going to the reunion was definitely outside of my comfort zone - none of my good friends were going, I didn’t have a plus one, I’m introverted, and even on the drive there my ego was like, “it’s not too late, let’s not go.” Thankfully, I didn’t listen. I told my ego that we’d go for 30 minutes and if I wasn’t enjoying it, I could leave. I actually ended up staying for several hours and had a great time catching up with people. I even won an award for the most countries traveled to. I’m sharing this experience with you in the hopes that you’ll feel inspired to write your own badassery list and celebrate your accomplishments. That you take a moment from the inner and outer judgments and noise to reflect on what has meaning for you. That you take those steps outside of your comfort zone so your soul can stretch, grow, and learn. If you’re someone who has been playing small, that you decide to play big. You deserve that. From one badass to another, I see you and I celebrate you! Heart Hugs, Adrienne :) |
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June 2024
AuthorHello! I'm Adrienne Almamour, an empathic intuitive conduit. I assist people by detecting and clearing their subconscious emotional energy blockages. This blog is a commentary and reflection of life from an intuitive standpoint which also incorporates ways that allow us to be from our heart. |