The holidays can be triggering for many. It can be triggering for those who aren’t with family and also for those who are. I have experienced quite a few major holidays by myself. It’s not easy, nor much fun. I would still decorate, cook something special, and celebrate on my own, but those times helped me realize that the holidays are more about connecting with others, especially with family. Gathering with family can come with its own bag of issues. Our family members know how to push our buttons, and it’s fair to say we know how to push theirs too. Family get-togethers can be particularly challenging for empaths and HSPs (highly sensitive persons), like myself. While some may thrive on the noise and chaos, my nervous system goes into overdrive. Even though I truly enjoy seeing and spending some time with family, I have to take extra care of my needs so that I’m not left overly exhausted or stressed out. Here are some practical tips that I'm using to help enjoy the holidays. They’re applicable whether you’re an empath, highly sensitive, or not. 1. When a family member insults or upsets you, take a step back, take a deep breath, and remember that what comes out of their mouth says more about them than you. They’re usually projecting their own stuff or defending their own ego. At the end of the day, your opinion of yourself and your values matter way more than the opinions they may have of you. 2. When drama starts building, you have a choice: you can chip in and generate more drama, or you can choose to stay out of it, even walk away. Some people thrive on drama, and they need others’ energy to keep it going. Why bother empowering them? You can try switching the subject or simply say you’re not interested. Worst case scenario, leave the room or go get some air. 3. If things are chaotic and you’re feeling overwhelmed, take 20-30 minutes away for yourself. Go into a room, lock the door, and rest or do something relaxing. Even better is getting outside and taking a walk. If you’re someone who starts to feel drained by being around so many people or a lot of activity, then you definitely need some alone time to recharge. 4. Flexibility is a great skill that can be learned. Dynamics will shift when family is involved. Plans may change, the most unexpected things may come up, and your gathering may not pan out how you imagined it. When things are out of your control, again, take a step back, breathe, and just allow it to play out. There is no point in adding more stress to yourself. You deserve better than that. 5. At the same time, it is important to put up and maintain your boundaries when someone tries to cause you mental, emotional, or physical harm. Just as important is putting up boundaries when you start getting overwhelmed. It’s all about looking after your own well-being. Women especially will put everyone else’s needs first. You can’t pour from an empty cup. Take care of yourself, delegate, and ask for help so that you have the energy and wherewithal to then look after everyone else. How about you? Do you have any great tips that help you enjoy the holidays? Please do share. Even though family can sometimes be our biggest point of stress and frustration, they are also one of our greatest sources of connection. I hope your holidays are filled with lots of love and some fun and wonderful memories that will fill your heart over the coming year. Heart Hugs, Adrienne :)
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Spoiler alert: if you haven’t seen Twisters and are planning to, skip to the second paragraph.
I was flying cross-country a few weeks ago and decided to watch one of the movies that the airline offered. I rarely watch movies from the U.S., but they had one I actually did want to see - Twisters. I thought the first one, Twister, from the 90s was really good, so I was interested to see what they’d do with the second one. Twisters actually surprised me; not only did the female lead design the project, but in the end, it was her who saved the day. I thought for sure the male lead would’ve jumped in the truck with her, but no, Kate was the one who made the decision to risk her life to save the lives of others. Of course there’s way more to the movie, but seeing a female lead save the day multiple times was so incredibly refreshing. Growing up in the Midwest, it was necessary to learn the difference between a tornado watch (conditions are right) and a warning (there’s an actual tornado). We know to seek shelter somewhere below ground, away from windows. We also know the signs to look out for: dark/greenish sky, large hail, sounds like a freight train. I still remember being under a tornado warning and hearing the sound of a freight train. That was a stressful few seconds until I realized it was an actual freight train. I chuckled from sheer relief. While I haven’t personally experienced a tornado, I’ve had a few close calls of them passing within a mile or so of my location in different cities and states. One such time was when I was teaching summer classes for migrant children. We were immersed in our lesson when the principal rushed in and directed us to immediately move to the kindergarten classrooms. They had us all squeeze into two bathrooms that were inside the classrooms. Apparently they were the designated safety shelters with no windows. We waited for what felt like an eternity, crammed together, straining our ears for what might come. I was trying to stay calm as the kids were looking to me for how they should react. About 20 minutes after we took shelter, we were told it was safe to come out. It turns out that the tornado had touched down about a mile or so from us - before we’d even taken shelter. One late spring evening, I was at a friend’s house in Puebla, Mexico. The sky had a strange color; it was warm, and then it started hailing. I panicked as my friend doesn’t have a basement. In fact, I’ve yet to see a house there that does. My friend was unfazed as she wondered how much damage the hail would do to her garden. Very flustered, I asked her what we were supposed to do. She couldn’t figure out why I was acting the way I was. I pointed to the hail and the sky and said, ”These are signs of a possible tornado!” She laughed and replied that they don’t have those. Even though I haven’t seen a tornado up close and personal, nor do I want to, they do frequent my dreams. When I have a tornado dream, I know that a big change is on its way. I was once dreaming of my on-again, off-again boyfriend. He was in his truck, and I was standing by the driver’s door trying to talk to him through the window. We spotted a tornado headed right at us. He got out of the truck and ran away, leaving me there. I watched as the tornado carried his truck away. That was my intuition/psyche telling me that it was time for that relationship to end. Whenever I realize that I’m in a tornado dream, my first thought is usually, Oh crap, since I know they mean a life change, usually one I’ve been resistant to. Tornadoes can hold different meanings in our dreams. For me, they represent change, but they can also symbolize feeling out of control or the fear of losing control. In waking life, they can create chaos, destruction, and loss. One thing I learned from the movie that I didn’t realize is how dangerous it is to go under an underpass when you’re driving. The wind can be channeled even faster through an underpass, and you may be more likely to be hit with debris. It’s recommended to find a low-lying ditch and lie flat on the ground while covering your head if there isn’t some kind of shelter nearby. I recommend watching Twisters if you haven’t seen it yet. I also recommend learning how to recognize tornado conditions and how to keep yourself safe should you ever encounter one, as they can occur all over the world. If tornadoes show up in your dreams, it would be worth researching their meaning. You can Google and see what resonates, or find someone who can analyze dreams. Regardless of how they show up, they are a force of nature that needs to be respected. As children, my siblings and I used to play ghosts in the graveyard. It’s basically hide-and-seek, but in the dark. That thrill of excitement, mixed with a little tinge of fear, made the game so much fun. I have to admit, I miss some of that childhood innocence. In my later years, even just passing by a cemetery would fill me with such dread and anxiety. Little did I know when I was telling ghost stories to try to scare the other kids that I would later become an adult recounting real stories. I wonder what I would have thought back then if I knew that ghosts would become a part of my reality. Entity issues started in my late teen years. What I went through was scary. I didn’t like it, and I really didn’t understand it. No one believed me that I was being harassed by a spirit, which was so frustrating. I eventually brought in a woman I knew to get rid of it. Thankfully, what she did worked. I was so relieved and figured that was the end of that. Hah! Yeah, no. Decades later, while living in Sedona, AZ, I became aware of my gift of connecting with the deceased. In those early days, while I was learning how to deal with my new gifts, I would have spirits show up who wanted to speak to the living people in front of me. I discovered that delivering these messages like a medium was not for me. Instead, I found I had a different way of helping them. I think it was about a year after my intuitive gifts opened up that I was shown how to do crossovers by a renowned figure from the Spirit Realm. In the past decade, I have assisted in the crossover of thousands of spirits. I feel like I came into this life with a soul contract to help those in need transition back to the Spirit Realm. Since I would hate to be stuck myself, I am grateful to be of service. When I do crossovers, it’s not just for humans - I’ve witnessed animals and nature spirits as well. Going places can sometimes get tricky for me. Driving past a cemetery was the worst. As soon as I’d pass by, there would be anywhere from one to many spirits sitting in the car with me. Let’s just say this freaked me out for a good while. I started to realize that there wasn’t much I could do to avoid them. They’d show up in hotel rooms, houses I rented, at work, through my sessions, and even while I was out hiking. Can I see them? Not with my physical eyes, but I can see them with my 3rd eye, which is a different kind of sight. During the first year of my helping spirits move on, I was exploring a national park with my then-boyfriend. All of a sudden, I got the nudge for a crossover. Hundreds upon hundreds came into that space. I felt a bit silly and self-conscious going through the procedure of crossing them over, but did so anyway as so many were present and waiting. When you’re the only one who can sense them, it makes it tough to not come across as crazy. There have been times when others have sensed what was going on. I was once on the beach with a client, and the beach filled up with spirits. Both the client and myself were seated in the sand, and as they began crossing over, we were pushed over by the sheer force of the energy that was moving. There were so many - probably the largest crossover I’ve seen to date. Another time, I was walking in a park with a friend, and I told her that I needed a minute to do a crossover. I asked her to walk away from the area and up a hill. She did so, and I did the crossover. When we met back up, I thanked her for her patience and trust. She commented that as she was observing me, all of a sudden she could see a light around me while I was doing the crossover. Her telling me that brought me into a state of awe and gratitude. I love when others can pick up on these things. Usually, when I do crossovers, they are groups of spirits. Occasionally, I’ll run into a sole spirit who somehow recognizes that I can help them. One day, I had to run an errand. After taking care of what I needed to do, I returned to my car and unlocked the door. All of a sudden, I smelled curry. Curry is already intense, but this was really strong. I wondered where it was coming from; there weren’t any Indian restaurants around. I didn’t give it much more thought until I smelled it again while I was driving. I thought it was strange, but quickly switched my focus back to driving. I arrived back home and went to unlock my front door, and again, the very strong smell of curry. That’s when it dawned on me: I realized a spirit used the curry smell to get my attention so I could help him cross over. We took care of it then and there, and I didn't smell the curry again. Not all spirits wish to be crossed, and I can’t force them. Once, I was at a rest stop, and I sensed a woman in the bathroom stall with me. I asked what was going on, and she expressed that she’d been murdered and wanted revenge. I explained that I could help her crossover, but in no way would I be assisting with revenge. She shoved me into a wall. Lessons learned: call in protection before conferring with a spirit, and you can’t help if they’re not ready or willing. Whenever there’s a tragedy that comes into my awareness, I will check to see if anyone is in need of being crossed over. I helped about a dozen people, including children, who perished in the fire in Maui. It was the first time a spirit came up to me and asked me a question before crossing over. A man asked me, “Why did we have to die?” How did I answer? “I don’t know the reasoning behind what happened. I do know that you’ll find your answer once you crossover - once you go back home to the Spirit Realm.” They all crossed, and I'm sure they found their answer. My latest experience was just a few weeks ago. I decided to stop by the cemetery to visit my grandpa’s grave as we share the same birthday. I thought I’d protected myself well enough. When I left the cemetery, all kinds of crazy things started to happen. Things were going wrong left and right, and I felt like I couldn’t think straight. I wondered if I’d pushed myself too far with the day’s activities. I attributed it to low blood sugar. I arrived home and had to sleep. I was down for 3 days; I was so drained. I finally tuned in to see what was going on; I’d been swarmed. When I left the cemetery, about 300 spirits attached to my energy and accompanied me until I crossed them over. Not all 300 were from that particular cemetery. It’s like a beacon goes out, and they come from all over. Even when I do crossovers, more spirits will show up than the ones that I know will be crossing. How did I not realize I'd been swarmed? I think my body went into such a state of overwhelm that I couldn't think straight and put two and two together. Once I figured it out and helped them cross, I slowly started to get back on my feet. I’ve learned how to coexist to the best of my ability. I set my boundaries, get clearings when I need them, and work with the Angelic Realm for protection. As you may have noticed with the swarm story, there is a learning curve to this. Of course, there are many more experiences I could share, but you might be wondering why people don’t crossover in the first place. I’ve come to find that it can be due to a variety of reasons. Sometimes, like the woman at the rest stop, they want revenge; sometimes they stay behind with a loved one who hadn’t crossed or are waiting for someone; sometimes they’re afraid for religious reasons; and sometimes they don’t realize that they're dead. These are some of the most common reasons as to why there really are ghosts in the graveyard - and all around us. Wishing you a Happy Halloween, Adrienne :) As I’ve recently entered a new decade of life, I started to think back over what I’ve experienced, achieved, and learned. I feel like I’ve definitely gleaned some wisdom that I’d love to share with you in this post. Here are some gems that have helped shift and shape my life:
Are there any from this list that jump out for you? Are there any that really resonate with you? What would you add to this list? What wisdom have you gleaned from your life experiences? What have you learned that you feel is share-worthy? (1) https://science.nasa.gov/universe/overview/building-blocks/ Heart Hugs,
Adrienne :) Today's post will be a bit different. I'd like to lead you through a visualization to connect with your Soul. It's so important to connect with this aspect, to listen to its wisdom. Your Soul is your true essence, the you that goes on after your human life finishes. It is the quiet yet powerful voice that connects us to life at a much deeper level. For the visualization, I recommend you record yourself reading it. Give yourself a pause of 1-2 minutes when you get to the part where you're meeting your Soul and asking your question. You can use the photo above if you need a focal point. "Imagine that you are in the Arizona desert. The sun is shining and the temperature is warm. You are standing next to an opening in the ground. It is the beginning of a slot canyon. You see some steps that will take you down into the canyon. Know that the sunlight reaches the bottom of the canyon, leaving it fully illuminated. Imagine that you are now descending the steps that lead you further down, down, down to the canyon floor. The sandstone walls tower above you. You begin to walk forward along a soft, sandy path. Around every bend is a different design. It is nature's architecture. As you continue to walk along the path, the light filters in from above, and the sandstone changes color from light browns to deep orange. You come to a spot that is more open. You stop and sit on the cool ground. You take a deep breath in through your nose and exhale through your mouth. You repeat this breath two more times. As you begin to relax, you feel as if time has stopped. You can sense that this is a sacred space. Just as you climbed down the steps to the canyon floor, now imagine going down steps leading from your head into your heart. You bring your full attention to your heart. Using your name, greet your Soul. Take a moment to just be with your Soul. Ask your Soul - what is it I need to know? What is it I need to know? Listen for the response. It may come to you in words, images, sounds, symbols, or ideas. Don't judge it; just allow. Once you have received your message, take a moment to express gratitude. Feel gratitude to your Soul, to this place, to Mother Gaia, and to whomever you call Source. Take a deep breath in through your nose and exhale through your mouth. Now, envision yourself standing up and continuing to walk along the sandy path until you reach a series of steps that will take you up and out. You climb the steps up, up, up until they lead you out of the canyon. When you come out of the canyon, feel your feet standing on the solid ground. You are rooted, you are connected. You are connected to your body, to the earth, and to your Soul. Once again, take a deep breath in through your nose and exhale through your mouth. When you are ready, you can open your eyes." How was it? Be sure to write down your Soul's message and any details about what you experienced in this visualization. If you didn't get a message, that's o.k. It may take doing this visualization a few times before you're open enough to receive. Heart Hugs,
Adrienne 💕 I saw this image on Facebook and had to do some research to find that it’s attributed to Rivka Grace Savitri. Part of it really resonates: treat everyone as if they’re sacred so as to allow that aspect to reawaken. The truth is, we are all sacred. We all have a soul, but we also have a kind of amnesia. We’ve forgotten that we are a Soul who comes from the Divine and that we are here to human in this world. We are sacred by our very nature. When we transition from this life, our body doesn’t go on, but our Soul does. The catch here is that we aren’t the only sacred ones on this planet. They say the eyes are a window to the soul. Have you looked into the eyes of an animal? It’s obvious that they have their very own essence. They are more than just a dog, cat, horse, or whale. Nature in and of itself is sacred. We need to start treating her as such. Every tree, seashell, fruit, and flower is sacred. Yet, human mentality remains stuck in the idea that we’re here to dominate. No, we’re here to coexist. To bless the food we eat, to breathe the oxygen that the trees and sea impart, to be stirred by the beauty of the flowers — even those we consider weeds. What I think needs more reflection in the quote above is the usage of “soulless world.” It’s easy to see why one would describe our world as soulless: school shootings, human trafficking, murder, violence, destruction, and greed are a few of the things that come to mind. Instead of seeing it as a soulless world, I invite you to see it as disconnected. Allow me to explain. Years ago, while I was living in Sedona, I found out that a classmate had been brutally murdered by the man she was in a relationship with. Let’s just say that he played the insanity card, and shockingly, the court went along with it. It’s pretty obvious you’d have to be in some state of insanity to murder and then mutilate someone. I was furious. This man had no soul and was just pure evil! A teacher at the yoga center I attended shared her view with me after I told her what had happened. She said, “We all have a soul. The issue is that we can become disconnected from it. That man does have a soul; he’s just very disconnected from it.” That was a new concept for me. I had always thought that if it seemed like you were pure evil, then you didn’t have a soul. It took awhile for this new perspective to sink in. Now, it’s an understanding that I hold. Connecting to our soul — to our sacredness — is the individual journey of each person. We can reflect the sacredness we see in others, and we can walk our own talk and be an example of it. It all starts with understanding that we are a sacred Soul who is humaning. To create that connection, we need to do our healing as well as our inner work, shift non-serving thoughts and beliefs, and make the effort to connect with that aspect of ourselves. This is where meditation comes in handy. It’s a great way to connect with your Soul self. If we wish to alchemize the world into a more connected place, we need to recognize the sacredness in ourselves, in others, in Nature, of this planet, and that of life. For those who are completely disconnected from their sacred self, from their Soul, and are committing atrocities, we can pray. We can pray for them to recognize their Soul aspect and that they are provided ways to connect with it. In the meantime, it is up to us to live by example if we so choose. The bottom line is that life is indeed more soul-full when we recognize the sacred. Heart Hugs, Adrienne :) It’s easy to think of someone as the enemy when we generalize them, shove them into a descriptive box, and dehumanize them. Of course, we don’t usually realize we’re doing this. We just see them that way for whatever reason we have. Our government declares our enemies; some religious dogmas do the same. Don’t get me started with political parties. The “us” vs “them” mentality is what keeps us in discord; is what keeps us divided. Did you ever notice that the identity of the enemy is ever-changing? In WWII Germany, Italy, and Japan were our (U.S.) enemies. Yet, in 2024, they are not. The Soviet Union was an ally in WWII, yet that ended with the Cold War. My Grandpa was a marine in WWII and fought at Iwo Jima. I’m sure it never crossed his mind that a future grandchild would be living and teaching in the very country he was fighting against. During the Cold War, my mom, as an elementary student, would have to hide under her desk during the air raid drills. At that age, I’m sure she’d never imagined that in her adult years she’d be having dinner with her daughter’s friends from Russia. The irony was not lost on me when I was touring the Anne Frank house in Amsterdam with two young boys I was a nanny for. The boys are Jewish; my maiden name is German. I have heard people rant about how the illegals need to be kept out and how they’re ruining our country. They speak of them with such contempt which makes me want to cry. Why? Because I have seen them first hand walking the dangerous journey from southern Mexico to what they hope will be a new and better life - if they can get across the border. Among them were many kids who looked to be my nephew’s age (teenager). As an empath, I don’t have to walk in their shoes to know what they were feeling. As an adult woman, the motherly side of me wanted to protect them. It’s easy to judge when someone looks or acts differently from you - more so when they hold different beliefs. It’s easy to generalize: democrats, republicans, black, white, Asian, straight, gay, trans, Christian, Jew, Muslim, illegal, migrant, refugee, liberal, conservative, sports fanatic, nature nut, geek, jock, emo, environmentalist, conspiracy theorist, and the list goes on. It’s so easy to put people in a box, but no one is specific to that one generalization alone. When you really take a moment to get to know someone, you’ll be amazed at what you actually have in common. Years ago, TV2 Denmark put out a fantastic ad. There are squares on the floor outlined by tape. Standing inside each square is a group of people - nurses, tattooed, sports fanatics, bodybuilders, etc. They then asked questions such as, Who was the class clown? Who loves to dance? Who was bullied? Who was the bully? Those who identified with the question, moved to the center of the room. There was such a mix of people for each of the questions. Another ad, this time by Coke, reminds us not to judge a book by its cover. They begin the commercial by stating that it takes 7 seconds to build a prejudice based on someone’s appearance. They show several men sitting at a table in the dark, and each describes a bit about himself while the others guess what he looks like. When the lights come up, they’re all shocked. The message of the commercial is that labels are for cans, not people. In case you haven’t heard of Humans of New York (HONY), I highly recommend checking it out. For years, Brandon has been out on the streets of NYC photographing, interviewing people, and then sharing their story on social media. Reading their stories brings out the human side of strangers. I’ve always said that HONY is bringing humanity back into the picture. I invite you to try a little experiment. Look at one of the photos of someone he’s interviewed and see what thoughts come to mind. How do you perceive them to be? Then, read their story. After you’ve read their story, look at their photo again. Do you still perceive them the same way? On my global travels I’d inevitably run into people who immediately disliked me due to my nationality. I would tell them that I’m not my country - I’m just from there. There’s way more to me than my country of origin. Shouldn’t they get to know me first before judging me? Had they taken the time to get to know me, they most likely would’ve found that I don’t fit their stereotype. Had we actually conversed, I bet we could’ve found some commonalities. Isn’t it about time we start looking past generalizations and begin breaking stereotypes? They are just constructs - constructs that we can choose to cement or disassemble. It can all begin with one conversation. The openness to hear the other person out, the willingness to get to know them and discover some commonalities. At the end of the day, you never know when your enemy could become an actual friend. Love, Adrienne :)
As someone who grew up using logic and then had her world flipped upside down to where logic no longer applied, it became rather difficult to make decisions. I’d always relied on my mind. I’d analyze the situation, look at the pros and cons, and make my decision based on the data. I had come to understand that following your heart was what you did with love and even then, there was a really good chance it could mislead you. When I could no longer rationalize what I was seeing and experiencing as my gifts surfaced, I had to start leaning into my intuition, into my heart. It was the only semblance of GPS that could help me make sense of things. When I first started my company, the name BE from the Heart came to me. Little did I know that it wasn’t just a nice name, but rather a journey that I would embark upon. Which is more powerful, the brain or the heart? When we are a fetus, our heart begins to develop and beat before the brain even develops. Did you know that the heart can actually be considered another brain? It has its own intrinsic cardiac nervous system whose neural network can sense, process, and learn like the brain’s neural circuits. It can also act independently of the brain. Our heart’s rhythms can actually affect the brain’s ability to process information. The HeartMath Institute has been able to show how heart coherence (the alignment between the heart, mind, emotions and physical systems) is able to impact our brain’s functioning as well as our immune system. As for communication, there are more signals traveling from the heart to the brain than from the brain to the heart. The strength of the electromagnetic field of the heart is 100 times greater than that of the brain’s and can change according to your emotions. The heart is also considered a gateway to the Soul. Then, where is the mind? Though we mostly sense our mind in our head, scientists have yet to identify where it’s actually located. The ego vs. the Soul The ego is associated with the mind and the Soul with the heart. Who is your ego to you? More importantly, who is your Soul to you? Have you heard of Descartes' saying, “I think therefore I am?” We all have a ton of thoughts. Now, have you ever observed your thoughts? If so, who is that observer? That right there clues us into the fact that we are more than just our minds. We’ll come back to this in a moment. First, I’d like for us to take a look at the ego. I have come to understand that the ego is our SOS - our survival operating system. The ego is there to help us survive. It will do its very best, but is often misguided. This is due to how we start forming our belief systems as children when we have very little access to context. We see one aspect and create a story around it. For example, let’s say you’re 3 years old and you show your mom a picture that you just drew for her. You wait for her praise and affection, but are startled when she yells at you and throws your drawing away. Your young brain tries to make sense of this and ends up creating a story that if you draw something for others, it’s bad and you won’t be loved. So, you no longer want to draw; it doesn’t bring you the joy it did before. What you didn’t know was that you drew on an important contract, your mom was already really stressed out, and she had to go about getting another contract when she was already dealing with an overfilled plate. If you could’ve seen the full context, you would’ve understood that the act of sharing your drawing wasn’t the issue. Since we can’t see the entire picture, we create a story that is meant to protect us. Oftentimes, what we think is protecting us, is actually sabotaging us. Think of a belief system like a folder on your computer. Inside that folder are files that relate to the topic of the folder. Using our drawing example, the folder would be called DON'T DRAW! One of the files (belief codes) inside that folder would be “I know I’m not loved if I draw.” That file will contain the story and the emotions that came along with the experience. Another file (belief code) could be “It’s not safe to draw,” and under that is the time you got in trouble at school for doodling, along with the time you got a D on your sketch in art class. When we encounter situations, our brain will look through all of our files to see what matches with circumstances and/or emotions. Your ego will make a judgment call, and you’ll proceed to react or act based on the files that pop up. The good news is that you can delete files and you can change belief systems. You can prove to yourself that the old files no longer hold validity and create new ones for your brain to pick from. Oftentimes these files are hidden, so it takes some digging to bring them to the surface where you can work to clear them. Now, let’s get back to the Soul. As my work takes me into the Spirit Realm, I’ve come to learn some interesting Truths. First, we are not a body that has a soul, we are a Soul that has a body. Our Soul is from the All That Is; it is divine in nature. You are that spark of the Divine who came in to human as (insert your name here). I am humaning as Adrienne. You are humaning as ________. When it is time for us to transition, our Soul will continue on - it does not die. Second, I have found that Hell does exist, here on Earth, because we create it. Contrary to what some dogma needs you to believe, it is not a place where "bad" Souls end up after being judged. Many religions claim that God is unconditional love. This begs the question, how can an unconditionally loving God/whatever you call it be judgmental? If it’s judgmental, then it can only be conditionally loving. Let that soak in for a minute. I have had experiences where I've been able to feel the energy of the other side, the place we go to after we leave our body. It’s a type of love, bliss, and peace I’ve yet to experience in human form. Third, it is important to know that the Soul cannot be harmed. Yes, you can face physical, emotional, and mental “brokenness” and trauma, but when all is said and done, your Soul remains intact. This brings to mind Einstein’s Law of Conservation of Energy - energy can neither be created nor destroyed; it can only change from one form into another. Is it necessary for the ego to die? I’ve been seeing the trend on the topic around ego death, and I wonder, Why does it have to die? I get the idea that if you can transcend the ego, then you can get closer to or reach enlightenment. Since the ego is our SOS (survival operating system), and we came here to human, why can’t we keep the ego? In fact, don’t we need it? Instead of trying to boot the ego out of the car, why not move it to the back seat? We don’t want the ego driving our life, but it ended up in our car for a reason. It’s a part of the human experience. Instead of trying so hard to eradicate the ego, why not turn that focus into connecting with our Soul self who can override the ego? As I mentioned, we carry a lot of beliefs that we may feel are truths, but actually aren't. The ego will use those to continue to protect us, except we're not 3 years old anymore. This is where our intuition comes into play. If we can listen to that voice, it has a way better idea of what's actually going on than the mind ever does. "Act from the heart, adjust from the head." — Margery Williams I’d like to circle back to the question: Should you listen more to your mind or your heart? I say give more credence to your heart, but also take your logic into account. Years after a bad breakup, I was finally willing to take another chance. I could feel my heart opening and I felt so much joy. I was able to see that my heart was not completely shut down and that I could love again. As much as I wanted to get lost in that feeling (and almost did), I started to see a lot of red flags. Actually, it was my intuition that got my attention first. When I started to logically put things together, I realized that the man I was with was also seeing someone else. I don’t regret for a moment allowing my heart to feel that love, openness, and willingness. I’m grateful to my intuition and my mind putting it together to help me see a situation that wasn’t in my best interest. The next time you need to make a decision, why not ask your heart how it feels? "The power of the heart is to be connected with who you are at the deepest level." — Eckhart Tolle What it means to BE from the Heart Over the years, I have come to know that BEing from the heart is about:
6 ways to help you return to your heart:
Heart hugs, Adrienne :) “O’er the land of the free and the home of the brave.” - Francis Scott Key As it is Independence Day here in the United States, it’s an opportunity to reflect on our freedoms. Though not complete freedoms, we do have a lot of leeway in regards to political, economic, religious, intellectual, digital, and personal liberties. There are also a lot of constraints around those freedoms and complacency is not going to bring about more freedom. Quite the contrary, it’s how we’ll lose our freedoms. As Americans, we will proudly tell anyone that we are a democracy. Imagine my shock when I spent some time in Switzerland and realized that they have a direct democracy. The people actually get to vote directly on issues; unlike our representative democracy, where we elect people to decide and vote for us. I know there are quite a few issues here in the States that I would like to directly vote on and feel like my voice actually matters. We have the freedom to vote, but everything is basically controlled by the two parties who choose our candidates. If the two current presidential candidates are the best these parties have to offer, it’s high time for a change and for the public to start paying attention to the Independent candidates. We have freedom of speech, yet we don’t if it goes against the powers that be. Whether you were for the vaccine or against it is of personal preference. What I found beyond disturbing was to see people who were trying to educate the public of the possible cons of the new vaccines, so that we could make a somewhat educated decision, were slandered and silenced. Their bank accounts frozen, their licenses threatened. We have been granted critical thinking skills for a reason. One of the greatest freedoms we have is to question and think for ourselves which can become challenging when information is controlled, withheld, manipulated, or fear-driven. “The function of freedom is to free someone else” - Toni Morrison I believe every human on this planet deserves the right to “life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness,” as stated in the Declaration of Independence. Sadly, there are many who live with more restrictions than freedom. There are an estimated 49.6 million people in modern slavery worldwide, 54% are women and girls, and 12 million are children. (ILO, United Nations; OUR Rescue). Human trafficking involves forced labor, sex trafficking, forced marriages, and child soldiers. It’s estimated that over 1 million people are living in modern slavery within the United States (GSI). You can help make a difference by becoming aware of the signs and (like the slogan post 9/11), if you see something, say something. "We must be free not because we claim freedom, but because we practice it." — William Faulkner When we think of the freedoms I mentioned above, those are external liberties. The freedoms I would like to celebrate today are the internal ones. Freedom from sabotaging beliefs, freedom from emotional blockages, freedom from the inner critic, as well as freedom from the walls we put up to protect ourselves from pain. I believe the most important and profound freedom is that of the Soul. The freedom to discover and express your most authentic self. The freedom to tap into and express your creativity. The freedom to connect with your innate gifts and talents and share them with the world. The freedom to shine your authentic light as fully and brightly as possible instead of dimming it, shrinking, and playing small. "Freedom lies in being bold." — Robert Frost It takes work to liberate ourselves from the societal, cultural, religious, and familial shackles that can hold our Soul back. Once removed, you will feel a greater sense of wholeness, connection, spaciousness, joy, and peace. It takes courage to question and challenge our beliefs. Often, we have taken on the beliefs of others without having realized it. It takes boldness to do the inner healing work from our past wounds and traumas; to heal the remnants from our past that weigh us down in the present. It takes persistence to silence that inner critic and allow our Soul’s voice to come through. Again, complacency does not lead to freedom. Being courageous, taking a stand for yourself, and stepping into action are what lead to freedom. While we may not have a lot of control around our external freedoms, we most certainly do when it comes to our internal freedom. Wishing you a Happy Independence Day,
Adrienne :) I was having a conversation with someone recently. This person is very dear to me, but we don't often see eye to eye. I started to feel frustrated as her beliefs are the stark opposite of my own. I voiced my take on the subject, she voiced hers. We were at an impasse, both feeling flustered, and we finally agreed to each their own.
It can come up in any conversation, that difference in opinion. How I see things and how you see things that are at opposite ends of the spectrum. What’s true for me is not true for you and vice versa. So, who’s right? More importantly, does being right even matter in the grand scheme of things? We tend to, whether consciously or unconsciously, tie our identity to our beliefs which is a big part of why we’ll defend them tooth and nail. We are each allowed our own beliefs, so why do we sometimes feel the need to impose them onto others? Usually, it’s to reinforce our identity. “I’m right, you’re wrong.” What if, just what if, you’re not right, or maybe you’re only partly right? We’re usually caught up defending a few pixels when there’s a much bigger picture. It’s like we’re only seeing pieces of a puzzle and think we know what the full design is. We may even be absolutely convinced that we know what the design is. That is, until we come across a puzzle piece that doesn’t fit with our view. It is then that we start to consider that maybe we’re not so sure of the design or that there's something more to it. Just because something is not in our awareness, or in our life experience, doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist. Just because something goes against our way of thinking, doesn’t necessarily mean it’s wrong. Our reality is created by what we’re focusing on and the meaning we give it. The meaning we give it is influenced by our beliefs. The kicker is, many of our beliefs aren't even our own. They are beliefs we took on from our family, friends, teachers, religious doctrines, and society in general. When someone challenges your beliefs, instead of automatically getting upset, or offended, question where your belief comes from. Is it yours? Do you actually believe it 100%? Could there be a few % of wiggle room that allows for further exploration? The Earth was known to be flat - until Aristotle and Eratosthenes contended that, from their observations, the Earth is a sphere. Galileo was charged with heresy by the Catholic Church for claiming that the Earth revolves around the sun. This countered the posture of the church which maintained that the sun and other planets revolve around the Earth. Dr. Ignaz Semmelweis, who discovered the importance of hand washing between patients and the cleaning of medical equipment, was ousted and ignored. Doctors and surgeons did not incorporate these practices until the late 1800’s. What was believed to be reality was changed by those who challenged it, by those who took us outside of the box. The egg — for years there have been arguments over whether it’s healthy or not, and whether it’s the white or the yolk that’s better for you. Then there’s pasteurized milk versus unpasteurized milk. Dare I mention the debate on vaccines? Whenever we read or refer to a scientific study, it’s important to consider if it’s looking at the bigger picture or is it just focusing on one aspect? Who paid for that study? Is it peer-reviewed? What are other similar studies saying? Even with the news, are they giving you the facts so that you can construct your own opinion, or are they pushing an agenda? Are they telling you what to believe? And then there's social media - from those who actually know what they're taking about based on their own experience to those who are there for the vanity clicks and are spouting whatever will draw people to their posts. It’s so incredibly important to question. It’s why we have critical thinking skills in the first place. For those who rely so heavily on science, it’s important to remember that science isn’t fixed. It’s always changing as there are new discoveries. Since I deal with the non-physical, I’m often countered with, “According to science, that can’t be true.” I simply say, “Science hasn’t caught up yet.” I’m not negating the importance of science by any means. Science requires curiosity and the willingness to challenge standing beliefs through new observations. Science definitely has its place, it’s just not the be-all end-all. We are all experiencing life in different ways. We see it through our predisposed lens of limited understanding. How I see things is different from how you do. How I have experienced the world is different from how you have. The cool thing is, we can always change the lens. It’s all about being curious, expanding, stretching beyond our comfort zone and outside of our box of knowledge. We aren’t aware of what we’re not aware of until we’re aware of it. Even with awareness, we get to decide what that means to us. The next time you’re in a disagreement over whatever the topic may be, hear them out. That doesn’t mean that you have to agree with them. It’s helpful to see things from another perspective. I know many of my beliefs have changed and evolved over time. That’s what we’re meant to do as a species, evolve. Heart Hugs, Adrienne :) I happened to see a clip the other day, from 1997, where Oprah defended her decision to interview with Ellen Degeneres. Ellen coming out as gay, on national television, was a pivotal and historical moment at that time. This clip caused me to really stop and pause and replay. The audience member couldn’t understand how Oprah could consider herself a Christian and yet support homosexuality. Oprah responded: “Well, I have a different view of Christian than you do, o.k. The God I serve doesn't care whether you're tall or short or whether you were born black, or Asian, or gay. So, that's just a difference of belief and I don't expect to change your belief today…” Oprah followed this by saying that she was late to the show because she’d been arguing with someone in the makeup room who proclaimed that all gays would go to Hell, and by her supporting them, she would too. This idea is one that completely confounds me - threatening others with damnation so that they fall into line with your belief system. I think people forget that the Bible was not written by Jesus himself and that it was heavily edited. Isn’t it interesting how the Gospel of Mary Magdalene is nowhere to be found in any of the official versions of the Bible? Yes, it has good teachings that can guide us and add value to our lives, but it’s also been used as a means to control and manipulate people. If your religion, whatever it may be, fills you with fear and hatred of others who are different from you, that is dogma, not spirituality. Jesus preached love, not judgment. Oprah continued to respond to the audience member: “I take full responsibility for my going to Hell or Heaven. I take full responsibility and I feel that everybody who's concerned about me now going to Hell because I'm doing the Ellen Degeneres show - I think that you all should take that energy and try to create a little Heaven here on Earth for everybody.” Well said, Oprah! Can you imagine how much better the world would be if we each tried to create some Heaven on Earth? If we each connected to our own heart, our own Soul, and brought out our true qualities and gifts to share with the world instead of pointing fingers, shaming, creating division, and even lashing out with hate and violence? The video ends with Oprah stating: “See, I believe God created Ellen. I believe God did that. Ellen says she's gay. I believe God created her gay. I believe God did that.” The audience member countered: “You can't stand up there on that show, and in front of this whole American society, and say that you support that.” Oprah’s response: “I support her right to be who she thinks she is.” And, mic drop. I was amazed at Oprah’s strength and how she maintained her stance. I found her very inspiring. I was also moved by the audience member who nearly cried as she challenged Oprah on her decision. I had empathy for her - not because she believed the Bible and the interpretation that all gays and people who support them will go to Hell, but because she was having one of her core beliefs questioned. Let me tell you, that’s shaky ground for the ego. As humans, we tend to take on our beliefs as our identity. The ego will defend its identity tooth and nail. But, you see, beliefs change. We’re meant to grow and expand and level up, so to speak. If you were to take away your identity of being Christian (or whatever belief system you hold), would you cease to exist? I'd like you to picture a bicycle wheel. Think of all of the different religions as spokes which connect to the wheel frame (Source). There is not one or two spokes, there are many. Most people believe that there is a Creator - we just label it by different names and honor it in different ways. Go back to that vision of the bicycle wheel and compare it with humankind. All races, genders, sexual preferences, religious preferences, and political preferences are all spokes of the wheel of humanity. Each spoke is of equal importance and value to the entirety of the wheel. Each spoke has its place in the wheel of life. Wouldn’t it be a more enjoyable ride if we’d stop trying to break off the spokes we don’t agree with? If you would like to watch the video clip mentioned above, you can find it here. Heart Hugs, Adrienne :)
“The real difficulty is to overcome how you think about yourself.” - Maya Angelou Take a moment to think about the following questions: Who is the person you are the hardest on? Who is the person that takes the brunt of your criticism? Who is the person you talk down to the most? In most cases, that person is yourself. It's that critical inner voice that gets really loud from time to time - that can be so harsh, so demeaning, so defeating, so…well… critical. We wouldn’t even dream of speaking to a child or a person we love with that tone of voice, yet we allow it to live rent-free in our head. How can we feel good about ourselves if our thoughts are telling us we’re not worthy, or we’re a failure, or no one could possibly love us the way we are? We make a mistake and that voice lambasts us. We try to change our life for the better, but that voice tells us that we can’t or that it’s safer to stay in our misery. We want to go for our dreams, but that voice assures us that they’re impossible and we don’t have the capacity to achieve them. The problem lies in giving credence to that voice. Our thoughts play a massively important role in how we feel, perceive, and act. What we have to keep in mind is that our critical inner voice isn't always our own. Some of those ‘voices’ come from family, teachers, friends, neighbors, religious institutions, the media, and our culture. We internalize those external “voices” (thoughts, beliefs, perspectives) and without realizing it, think that they are our own. In a society that seems to be more and more vanity-driven, it can be really challenging to come back to and stay true to ourselves. How many people base their worth on their success? On their physical appearance? On the number of followers and likes that they have? If we don’t dress, look, act, speak, or believe a certain way - how can we be liked or accepted? To not feel liked or accepted feels terrifying and that’s when our survival instincts kick in. The ego will do its best to help us survive, but that’s often misguided. The ego believes that if you maintain the status quo, all will be well. Externally it may seem that way, but internally you’ll feel unhappy, stuck, or empty. I love Brené Brown’s statement that “The opposite of belonging is fitting in.” When we do our best to fit in, we are giving up valuable aspects of ourselves. We are not being true to our Soul essence - our real and true self. You came into this human experience to be and express who you are. You’re nothing short of amazing, so why do you allow that critical voice to make you feel like shit? Why do you allow it to dim your light? Your life is yours - will you allow it to be ruled by other’s beliefs, projections, or expectations? Your Soul knows its inherent self-worth. I find it fascinating that when I catch my critical inner voice going off on me, I’ll check in with my Soul and ask if she feels that way too. I can feel in my heart that that’s not the case. This lets me know that I have some work to do. The mind can think and rationalize, but it’s the heart who really knows. We may not be able to completely shut off that critical inner voice, but we can certainly turn it down and we can challenge it. When that voice gets loud - pay attention. What is it saying to you? Is it even your “voice?” Does what it’s saying feel good to you? If it doesn’t feel good, if it doesn’t feel freeing or expansive - it’s time to change thoughts. When your critical voice tells you that you can’t do x, y, or z, you can respond with “watch me” and start taking action in the direction you want to go. When the voice says, “See, it’s impossible!” - you pivot to where possibilities lie. When it insists on certain “truths” that make you feel terrible about yourself, know that those are lies. Truth with a capital ‘T,’ as in core truths, doesn’t hurt. I can’t remember where I picked up this phrase over the years, but it’s been a game changer for me: “It’s none of your business what other people think of you.” I would add that it is your business what you think of yourself. No matter how ingrained a belief system is, it can always be changed. You get to decide how you feel and what you think about yourself and only you can do the work to get yourself there. Heart hugs, Adrienne :) Have you ever felt stuck? I’m talking about the quicksand kind of stuck. Where you feel like no matter how much you try to get yourself out of it, you just sink deeper in. You see other people walking along the path happily heading to where they want to be going and you’re just there - stuck. Maybe you’re stuck in a job you hate, stuck in debt, stuck in an unhappy relationship, stuck being single, or stuck in depression. Whatever it is, you feel like you can’t get out of the cycle. You’ve probably tried or are still trying, yet you feel like you’re just spinning your wheels. Does this sound familiar?
Going back to the quicksand example, you might be waiting for someone to pull you out. You might already be resigned to this being your fate and that’s where you’re going to stay. The mere idea of getting out and back onto the path you want to go down can seem overwhelming or even downright impossible. The more you struggle and resist, the deeper and faster you sink. You might even start telling yourself that it’s just how life is going to be for you. Or, maybe, the voice in your head has convinced you that the Universe doesn’t care about you because you’re not lovable or worthy or acceptable enough to be on the path leading to your dreams, to the life you really want. When you intend to get unstuck, the Universe will throw you a line - it may come in the form of a branch, a rope, a hiking pole, or maybe another person. Where you have to be careful is how you judge the form the help comes in. If you think that a branch won’t pull you out, you may end up ignoring it and feeling upset that this wasn’t the help you expected - the help you so desperately prayed for. You might be waiting for a superhero to come and rescue you. Unlike how the fairy tales and comic books assured us, the likelihood of that is pretty low. In truth, you have to be your own superhero. You have to save yourself. You have to use your inner strength, wisdom, and determination to use the tools at your disposal to get yourself unstuck. Usually when we feel stuck, we think it’s because of our circumstances - that it’s due to what’s going on outside of us. While the external can be a contributing factor, it’s more about what’s going on internally. It comes down to the thoughts we’re thinking, the perspectives we hold - how we see life, as well as the stories we’re telling ourselves. If you feel like you’re not worthy of more in your life, you’ll stay stuck. If you feel like life hates you and you hate it right back, you’ll stay stuck. If you continually beat yourself up for getting stuck in the first place and not getting out, you’ll stay stuck. If you feel you suck at life, you’ll stay stuck. If you feel like the odds are stacked against you and there’s nothing you can do about it, you’ll stay stuck. If you feel like your dreams are impossible for someone like you, you’ll stay stuck. If you believe what other people tell you about how you should just stay where you are or that you can’t change, guess what? You’ll stay stuck. Just as it takes small movements to free yourself from quicksand, it takes small action steps to free yourself from your cycle of stuckness. Not sure where to start? Here are some ideas:
Just as it’s possible to free yourself from quicksand, it’s also very possible to get out of your stuckness and back onto the path of the life you dream of. Back onto a path of the life you choose to live. If that's you, know that I'm cheering you on! Heart hugs, Adrienne :) She was wearing a white hat similar to mine. I held the door open for her as we both exited the store. We started conversing. She even asked if I had a moment to chat as we were talking. I marveled at that. She told me she’s almost 91, her husband is 85, and their kids are in their 60’s. She used to work in a factory and loves to line dance. This woman was very vibrant - spunky. She said that she keeps moving and that she can’t understand why their sons think they have to care for her since she’s mobile and can drive just fine. She talked about how her husband watches the 6:30 news and that it’s so depressing since there’s nothing they can do about it. She asked me my name and told me that hers is Velma - “a real old school name.” The only Velma I’d ever come across was the one in Scooby Doo. I LOVED meeting her. Our little exchange of several minutes brightened and set the tone for the rest of my day. It reminded me of how very precious face-to-face human connection is. She did not look her age, nor did she act it if you follow the ridiculous presumptions that society tends to hold of its elders.
Aging is a natural part of the human experience. When we’re younger, we can’t even imagine that we’ll ever get old. As we age, we tend to look for ways to slow that process down. Think of the multibillion dollar beauty industry. We even go as far as saying things like, "50 is the new 30." Sadly, our society (at least in the U.S.) lacks the care and respect for our most senior members. It almost seems like once you reach a certain decade, you’re written off. How sad is that? Our elders hold a lifetime of experiences and wisdom which is mostly lost on our younger generations. Even though our bodies do age, I think there’s a part of us that will always be a kid at heart. I remember when my Grandpa was passing in his early 90’s. He told me that he still felt like a young man on the inside, but that his body just couldn’t keep up with him. His wife is nearing 99 years of age at the moment. She amazes me in that she once again found a zest for life. She went from solely consuming Ensure to eating several meals a day - on her own. She also insisted on changing the color of her wardrobe to brighter colors. Every time I see her, she has her pretty pink lipstick on. I have been very fortunate to meet some of the most amazing role models of what “old age” can be like. I have a dear friend, Ruth, who was my yoga teacher. She was teaching yoga in her 70’s. She is now 100. She still walks on her own, though sometimes with the help of a walker. She lives in her own apartment in a retirement community. She’ll cook meals for herself. She goes grocery shopping. She swears that all of those years of yoga kept her in great shape for reaching a century. I was also graced to meet Harriotte, a busy practicing psychotherapist who would head to PIlates each week and walk her dog daily. When she retired about two years after I met her, she was in her early 90's. I have also met women who have started new careers much later in life and are absolutely flourishing. Aging doesn’t have to be the end-all. It also doesn’t have to be a battle. From what I’ve observed - staying active, having a good mindset, treating your body well, and finding the daily joys and your zest for life can bring about better longevity. Life isn’t over once you retire. It’s a whole new chapter. Aging most definitely does not need to equal invisible, useless, or irrelevant. It is high time we honor our elders and honor ourselves as we age. Every single day is precious and every single soul is precious. Our time on this planet, no matter how long or short, is valuable. If we want to live our life to the fullest, I think Velma hit the nail on the head, “just keep moving.” Heart hugs, Adrienne :) It was the late 1980’s and there I was participating in the citywide spelling bee. As a middle school student, I remember how nervous and uncomfortable I felt under the stage lights. Never mind the gymnasium full of chairs seated with family and friends of the contestants. We wore numbers and when it was our turn, we’d go up and receive the word that would determine if we were moving on to the next round or dejectedly leaving the stage. I remember the words were somewhat easy in the beginning - like a free pass or warm up. As more and more of my fellow participants were buzzed out and left the stage, I anticipated what my next word would be. I had been doing pretty well thus far.
Up to the mic went my nemesis. He was from my old school. We were always competing with each other for the best grades. I constantly felt like I had to prove myself, especially since I was “just a girl.” Needless to say, we didn’t get along all that well. I could see his back as he stood in front of the microphone. I heard the announcer give him his word. Quickly and confidently he spelled out l-i-b-a-r-y. The buzzer sounded. He’d forgotten the first "r." It was now down to just a handful of us. I’d always enjoyed spelling and always did well on my tests. It was fun for me to get a 100%, an A, or A+ if there were bonus words, and the sticker. Receiving a sticker was the absolute best. I was an avid reader, so I had a decent vocabulary. I knew the basic spelling rules - i before e except after c (except when it isn’t). I remember we had practice bees and there were lists to study. It was pretty much a role of the die as to which words you would get. I really wondered, what would fate have in store for me that night? After what seemed like an eternity, my number was once again called. Back up I went to the microphone. The gym was quiet. The announcer gave me my word. I asked him to repeat it. Then, I panicked. I’d never heard of this word before in my entire life. Each time he said the word, it sounded like a different pronunciation. I can’t remember if I asked for the definition, but it wouldn’t have mattered much. It seemed like there were at least 5 different ways this word could possibly be spelled. Could it be m-o-n-o-c-t-n-o-u-s? Or was it m-o-n-o-c-t-e-n-o-u-s? Maybe m-o-n-a-c-h-n-o-u-s? Then there’s m-o-n-a-t-e-n-u-s or would that be m-o-n-a-t-e-n-o-u-s? To this day, I have no idea what I spelled out, but the buzzer let me know that it was not correct. I was baffled. Jeez, my word was so hard! I left the stage feeling deflated, even though I should’ve felt proud that I was one of the last few standing. Monotonous - dull, tedious, and repetitious; lacking in variety and interest. As in boring, banal, mundane, and mind-numbing. The polar opposite of varied, diversified, exciting, and interesting. Monotonous was the word I misspelled and then stored in the back of my memory. It wasn’t until a few decades later that I really thought about the word that cost me the spelling bee. It was then that I realized just how important that word actually is for me. You see, how I’ve chosen to live my life is the exact opposite of monotony. I’m constantly trying new things, learning things that are outside of my comfort zone (hello tech), and living in other cultures and places because I love diversity and stretching myself through new experiences. What I detest the most is feeling bored. In fact, it’s rare that I ever even feel that way. If I start to feel bored with some aspect of my life, I know it’s time for some change. I can’t stand it when everything is the same and there’s little to no excitement. Life has so much to offer that there is no time for monotony. As I look over my life thus far, I can identify different themes that have come up, such as my infamous spelling word. I see them almost like bread crumbs that have helped lead me closer to my true self. I now joke that even if I had known the spelling of monotonous, it’s so against my nature that my subconscious would’ve had me misspell it anyway. I can just imagine it: I step up to the mic, I hear the word "monotony" and then I spell it m-o-N-O-T-in-me ;) Heart hugs, Adrienne :) I was going non-stop and I could feel my plate getting heavier and heavier. I’d eat something (complete a task) and something else would appear. Things just kept piling up on my plate and the more I’d say, "I have too much on my plate," the heavier it all felt and the more it would stress me out, causing me a literal stomach ache. Then, I realized that I have a choice to take it one bite at a time instead of focusing on the entire plate. I also get a say as to what ends up on my plate. There are foods (tasks) that I don’t want, that aren’t good for me, or I’m not ready to try yet that could come off of my plate. As people try to offer me more servings for my plate, I can simply say, "no, thank you." Some of this "food" can be stored in the fridge to be “eaten” another day. Some of it will rot if I don’t take deal with it now and I know that that’s where my attention needs to be. How about your own plate? How stacked is it? How heavy is it? How balanced is it with food you enjoy and food you have to force down? Are there bits on your plate that are rotting away? Are there portions that you don't even want to taste and put off eating, but once you finally do - you realize they don't taste that bad after all? I realized that I don’t want a plate heaped with all kinds of things. I do not desire a plate that is overwhelming and feels like I'll never finish. I absolutely don't want a plate that makes me nauseous just looking at it. I want something more balanced, more appeasing to my palate. There are certain things that I’ll still have to "eat" until I can find someone else who enjoys them and will gladly take them off my plate for me. I also recognize that there are times when I need to take some of my portion and serve (delegate) it to others. Life is like an all-you-can-eat buffet. There are a lot of options to choose from and the amount of food seems endless. The question is, do you really want to spend your entire day just "eating?" It’s not healthy to put all of your energy into solely “eating.” It's so important to step away from the plate and rest, to exercise, to do something fun. Take time to just stop - to meditate, to get out in Nature, to connect with people and have a great conversation. We all know that overconsuming real food isn't healthy for our body and can lead to physical issues and disease. Yet, how often do we overconsume our metaphorical plates? You have the choice to stop force-feeding yourself. You also don't have to continually serve yourself so much of what other people are telling you to eat. We will all have things on our plate that we'll need to "eat" whether we like it or not. We just need to make sure that we're balancing our diet and that there's food on our plate that we thoroughly enjoy. We need to remember to take breaks from our plates and to engage in other activities that bring us joy and soul nourishment. When that plate does become overwhelming, and you're starting to feel anxiety, go back to taking one bite at a time. Then, give yourself the opportunity to really take a look at your plate and figure out how to make it lighter and more appealing. Bon appétit, Adrienne :)
Like many people, a big theme in my life is freedom - freedom to be myself, to live where I want and how I want. Freedom from oppressive thoughts and beliefs. Freedom to share my gifts and to live life instead of life living me. Freedom from the emotional pain and heaviness of past experiences and trauma. The freedom to make choices, to respond instead of react. When we are caught up in beliefs that don’t serve us, we have lost some of our freedom. When we stay stuck in the past, or in victim mentality, we have lost a part of our freedom. When we refuse to feel our uncomfortable emotions and stuff them down instead, we have lost some more of our freedom. When we let fear dictate our decisions, you guessed it, we have lost a portion of our freedom. There is so much that happens at the subconscious level that can cause restrictions to our freedom which also impacts our happiness. It takes awareness and it takes some concentrated effort to begin to free the mind, the heart, and the soul. Ignorance may be bliss, but it is not liberation. Most of us haven’t really been taught how to handle our emotions. We’re told to stuff them down, to stop overreacting, or that we’re somehow bad or less than if we feel a certain way. Sometimes the feelings are just so big and painful, we don’t know what to do with them and instead will use t.v., gaming, social media scrolling, alcohol, or other substances to numb out the pain and discomfort. Many people have no idea that these emotions can get trapped in the body leading to all kinds of problems. Trapped emotional blockages can literally weigh you down, cause issues in your relationships, keep you stuck, lead to physical ailments, and or attract more of what you don’t want into your life. Did you know that the ego will actually take the energy from your emotional blockages and build what is called a heart-wall? This wall is the ego’s way of protecting you from emotional pain. Sounds like a great idea, right? Except it doesn’t work that way. We still feel the pain and can become closed off to love and joy. Add on top of that, what we hold attracts more of the same. As you can see, what we refuse to feel, doesn’t just disappear. It stays in the body and causes disruptions to our well-being. A newer release I’ve been seeing recently is what I call an emotion body. It looks like an energetic body that’s made out of one emotional frequency. It is formed by pulling in energy from emotional blockages that are held throughout the body. Whereas the heart-wall is made up of many different kinds of trapped emotions, the emotion body is just one frequency. An example would be an emotion body of anger. This anger body draws from the emotional blockages of anger that you’re already holding. An upside is that when we clear out the whole emotion body in one go, it clears out all of those blockages, whereas the heart-wall takes some time to drop since it’s made up of different emotional blockage frequencies. What’s key to understand is that if you’re holding a lot of anger, you’re going to attract more anger, or situations that cause anger, into your life. That’s one of the reasons why it’s important to work on clearing out this energy. Plus, you actually do feel lighter in the process. Another release I’ve been seeing more of is ancestral wounding. This is where someone goes through something so traumatic that they trap an emotional frequency along with specific belief codes surrounding the trauma. Unlike an inherited trapped emotion, where it’s hit or miss as to who inherits it, everyone related to the person at that time and all future generations of that bloodline take on this emotional blockage and belief codes. The clearing for this is very profound as it impacts past, present, and future generations. If you are finding this interesting and would like to learn more, I have a free mini-master course, Emotional Blockages 101, where you can learn more about these energies, how to work with your emotions so you don’t trap them in the first place, as well as what to do with the blockages you already have. Our emotions are such an integral part of being human, yet we’re pretty much left on our own to figure out what to do with them. Our emotions aren’t bad, they’re just energy that we need to learn how to work with. That’s what spurred me to create Emotional Blockages 101 - to provide some insight into our emotions and their blockages so we can learn how to handle them and process them. Don’t we all deserve our freedom? Don’t you deserve to feel lighter and not be weighed down by your past? Heart hugs, Adrienne :)
“It was only a sunny smile, and little it cost in the giving, but like the morning light it scattered the night and made the day worth living.” - F. Scott Fitzgerald I was having a really bad day. Everything was setting me off. I felt angry, frustrated, irritated, pissed off, and ready to lash out if one more thing came up. Life was not going my way in the slightest and it was driving me into despair. I was sitting in my car waiting on a red light. As the crosswalk sign turned green, I noticed a man walking from my right. As he passed in front of my car, he turned his head, looked at me while making eye contact, and had the biggest smile on his face. Immediately my energy shifted. It was as if all of the irritation, frustration, and despair just melted away. That man shared a most precious gift with me - his warm, happy, friendly smile. A smile that beamed from the inside out. It’s one of those moments I will never forget. Our smile is so powerful - it can shift our own energy, it can shift the energy in others. It can’t be just any smile though, it has to be one that’s connected to the heart - a real, genuine smile. The best are smiles that just beam out from us. Fake or forced smiles don’t cut it. A smirk doesn’t cut it. Smiles used to cover our fear or embarrassment don’t cut it. In order to smile more, we need to get in touch with our soul’s joy. What actually brings joy to your heart and a smile to your face? For me, it’s seeing something beautiful in nature, it’s hearing the laughter of kids (or adults acting like kids) playing and having fun, it’s watching a show that’s touching or makes me laugh. When I go into meditation and connect with my soul self, I smile. When someone does something kind, I achieve something, or I feel fulfillment, I smile. When I’m happy to see someone or it’s a sunny day, I smile. What are the sources of your soul smiles? Did any of the above images happen to bring a smile to your face? A smile from another warms the heart. It’s one of the loveliest gifts we can give each other and what does it cost us? A smile is presence, it’s sharing our joy. Again, we're not talking about forced smiles. It takes connecting to your heart, to your soul, to tap into the best smiles. Babies and kids do this pretty effortlessly. We adults need to work at it a bit due to our conditioning. A smile can be powerful medicine - it helps relax the body, puts us in a higher vibratory state, and helps keep our mood elevated. I challenge you to find your soul smile today - and let it beam. Heart hugs, Adrienne :)
“Someday. That's a dangerous word. It's really just code for 'never.'” - Roy Miller (Tom Cruise) from Knight and Day The above quote, from the movie Knight and Day, has stuck with me for over a decade. ‘Someday’ puts our desires far into the future - out of reach. They’re on our radar, but the likelihood of them happening is pretty low. ‘Someday, maybe…’ is even worse in terms of it ever happening. In my 20's and 30's, instead of chasing down a career and building a 401K, I traveled - all over the world. I remember people telling me that I should focus on work, and saving my money, so I could set myself up for retirement and then I could think about traveling. I hated that idea. My thought process was:
Sometimes our dreams, goals, and desires may seem so big, lofty, or unachievable that we feel safe saying we’ll get to them someday. My friends, someday isn’t going to just fall into your lap. You have to call it in. You have to give your dream focus, put energy into it, put intent behind it, and take action. Even consistent baby steps will get you there. Isn't it time to dust off those bucket lists? If you don’t have one, it’s time to write one. Stop putting it off and start taking the steps to get you to your dream. As an example, let’s say that one of your dreams is you’ve always wanted to travel to an exotic location. To keep it from the realm of someday/never, you have to start taking action now. You can simply start by:
We have one life that is meant for living. LIVING - not hoping that someday things will fall into our lap, that one day we’ll accomplish what we’ve been dreaming of, or that someday we’ll be happier. No matter how big your dream is, if you want it, then go for it. Just don’t say, “Someday I’ll… “ Change that to: “There is a day in my near future where I am..." Or, “Soon, I will…” Or, “In 1 (3, 5) years I am…" Or, simply, "I am ..." Here’s to taking action! Heart Hugs, Adrienne :)
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October 2024
AuthorHello! I'm Adrienne Almamour, an empathic intuitive conduit. I assist people by detecting and clearing their subconscious emotional energy blockages. This blog is a commentary and reflection of life from an intuitive standpoint which also incorporates ways that allow us to be from our heart. |