Like many people, a big theme in my life is freedom - freedom to be myself, to live where I want and how I want. Freedom from oppressive thoughts and beliefs. Freedom to share my gifts and to live life instead of life living me. Freedom from the emotional pain and heaviness of past experiences and trauma. The freedom to make choices, to respond instead of react. When we are caught up in beliefs that don’t serve us, we have lost some of our freedom. When we stay stuck in the past, or in victim mentality, we have lost a part of our freedom. When we refuse to feel our uncomfortable emotions and stuff them down instead, we have lost some more of our freedom. When we let fear dictate our decisions, you guessed it, we have lost a portion of our freedom. There is so much that happens at the subconscious level that can cause restrictions to our freedom which also impacts our happiness. It takes awareness and it takes some concentrated effort to begin to free the mind, the heart, and the soul. Ignorance may be bliss, but it is not liberation.
Most of us haven’t really been taught how to handle our emotions. We’re told to stuff them down, to stop overreacting, or that we’re somehow bad or less than if we feel a certain way. Sometimes the feelings are just so big and painful, we don’t know what to do with them and instead will use t.v., gaming, social media scrolling, alcohol, or other substances to numb out the pain and discomfort. Many people have no idea that these emotions can get trapped in the body leading to all kinds of problems. Trapped emotional blockages can literally weigh you down, cause issues in your relationships, keep you stuck, lead to physical ailments, and or attract more of what you don’t want into your life. Did you know that the ego will actually take the energy from your emotional blockages and build what is called a heart-wall? This wall is the ego’s way of protecting you from emotional pain. Sounds like a great idea, right? Except it doesn’t work that way. We still feel the pain and can become closed off to love and joy. Add on top of that, what we hold attracts more of the same. As you can see, what we refuse to feel, doesn’t just disappear. It stays in the body and causes disruptions to our well-being.
A newer release I’ve been seeing recently is what I call an emotion body. It looks like an energetic body that’s made out of one emotional frequency. It is formed by pulling in energy from emotional blockages that are held throughout the body. Whereas the heart-wall is made up of many different kinds of trapped emotions, the emotion body is just one frequency. An example would be an emotion body of anger. This anger body draws from the emotional blockages of anger that you’re already holding. An upside is that when we clear out the whole emotion body in one go, it clears out all of those blockages, whereas the heart-wall takes some time to drop since it’s made up of different emotional blockage frequencies. What’s key to understand is that if you’re holding a lot of anger, you’re going to attract more anger, or situations that cause anger, into your life. That’s one of the reasons why it’s important to work on clearing out this energy. Plus, you actually do feel lighter in the process.
Another release I’ve been seeing more of is ancestral wounding. This is where someone goes through something so traumatic that they trap an emotional frequency along with specific belief codes surrounding the trauma. Unlike an inherited trapped emotion, where it’s hit or miss as to who inherits it, everyone related to the person at that time and all future generations of that bloodline take on this emotional blockage and belief codes. The clearing for this is very profound as it impacts past, present, and future generations.
If you are finding this interesting and would like to learn more, I have a free mini-master course, Emotional Blockages 101, where you can learn more about these energies, how to work with your emotions so you don’t trap them in the first place, as well as what to do with the blockages you already have. Our emotions are such an integral part of being human, yet we’re pretty much left on our own to figure out what to do with them. Our emotions aren’t bad, they’re just energy that we need to learn how to work with. That’s what spurred me to create Emotional Blockages 101 - to provide some insight into our emotions and their blockages so we can learn how to handle them and process them. Don’t we all deserve our freedom? Don’t you deserve to feel lighter and not be weighed down by your past?
Heart hugs, Adrienne :)
“It was only a sunny smile, and little it cost in the giving, but like the morning light it scattered the night and made the day worth living.” - F. Scott Fitzgerald
I was having a really bad day. Everything was setting me off. I felt angry, frustrated, irritated, pissed off, and ready to lash out if one more thing came up. Life was not going my way in the slightest and it was driving me into despair. I was sitting in my car waiting on a red light. As the crosswalk sign turned green, I noticed a man walking from my right. As he passed in front of my car, he turned his head, looked at me while making eye contact, and had the biggest smile on his face. Immediately my energy shifted. It was as if all of the irritation, frustration, and despair just melted away. That man shared a most precious gift with me - his warm, happy, friendly smile. A smile that beamed from the inside out. It’s one of those moments I will never forget.
Our smile is so powerful - it can shift our own energy, it can shift the energy in others. It can’t be just any smile though, it has to be one that’s connected to the heart - a real, genuine smile. The best are smiles that just beam out from us. Fake or forced smiles don’t cut it. A smirk doesn’t cut it. Smiles used to cover our fear or embarrassment don’t cut it. In order to smile more, we need to get in touch with our soul’s joy. What actually brings joy to your heart and a smile to your face? For me, it’s seeing something beautiful in nature, it’s hearing the laughter of kids (or adults acting like kids) playing and having fun, it’s watching a show that’s touching or makes me laugh. When I go into meditation and connect with my soul self, I smile. When someone does something kind, I achieve something, or I feel fulfillment, I smile. When I’m happy to see someone or it’s a sunny day, I smile. What are the sources of your soul smiles?
Did any of the above images happen to bring a smile to your face? A smile from another warms the heart. It’s one of the loveliest gifts we can give each other and what does it cost us? A smile is presence, it’s sharing our joy. Again, we're not talking about forced smiles. It takes connecting to your heart, to your soul, to tap into the best smiles. Babies and kids do this pretty effortlessly. We adults need to work at it a bit due to our conditioning. A smile can be powerful medicine - it helps relax the body, puts us in a higher vibratory state, and helps keep our mood elevated. I challenge you to find your soul smile today - and let it beam.
Heart hugs, Adrienne :)
“Someday. That's a dangerous word. It's really just code for 'never.'”
- Roy Miller (Tom Cruise) from Knight and Day
The above quote, from the movie Knight and Day, has stuck with me for over a decade. ‘Someday’ puts our desires far into the future - out of reach. They’re on our radar, but the likelihood of them happening is pretty low. ‘Someday, maybe…’ is even worse in terms of it ever happening. In my 20's and 30's, instead of chasing down a career and building a 401K, I traveled - all over the world. I remember people telling me that I should focus on work, and saving my money, so I could set myself up for retirement and then I could think about traveling. I hated that idea. My thought process was:
Sometimes our dreams, goals, and desires may seem so big, lofty, or unachievable that we feel safe saying we’ll get to them someday. My friends, someday isn’t going to just fall into your lap. You have to call it in. You have to give your dream focus, put energy into it, put intent behind it, and take action. Even consistent baby steps will get you there. Isn't it time to dust off those bucket lists? If you don’t have one, it’s time to write one. Stop putting it off and start taking the steps to get you to your dream.
As an example, let’s say that one of your dreams is you’ve always wanted to travel to an exotic location. To keep it from the realm of someday/never, you have to start taking action now. You can simply start by:
We have one life that is meant for living. LIVING - not hoping that someday things will fall into our lap, that one day we’ll accomplish what we’ve been dreaming of, or that someday we’ll be happier. No matter how big your dream is, if you want it, then go for it. Just don’t say, “Someday I’ll… “ Change that to: “There is a day in my near future where I am..." Or, “Soon, I will…” Or, “In 1 (3, 5) years I am…" Or, simply, "I am ..."
Here’s to taking action!
Heart Hugs, Adrienne :)
There was a time in my life when feeling happy was physically painful. It actually became one of the major catalysts for my transformational growth journey. I decided there had to be more to life than the comfort of misery. By that point, I wasn’t even sure what it meant to feel happy. I’d done all the things that were supposed to make me happy, yet all I felt was emptiness. If I did feel happy, it was pretty short-lived. I’d achieved what I was told would bring me happiness, so why wasn’t I happy? It became my mission to figure it out. In this post, I’m going to share with you three key points I’ve learned over the years that have helped me understand what brings about real happiness.
1. Projecting happiness into the future keeps it there. Do you ever catch yourself thinking or saying, I will be happy when…
I get a promotion
I meet the love of my life
I pass the exam
I make a ton of money
I get the new car
I win the lottery
I make it to the weekend
(Insert yours here)
So, if you don’t get those things, will you not be happy? Or what if you do get them and the happiness is short-lived? Will you be happier when you get an even nicer car, a better promotion, or a new love? Will you put off your happiness while waiting on external things to happen or fall into place? By projecting your happiness into the future, you’re robbing yourself of the joy you could be living now.
2. Happiness isn’t about the externals - it’s about what lights you up on the inside. If you believe that something will bring you happiness, you need to ask yourself if it's to make your heart or your ego happy. Real happiness is not about appeasing the ego. Would you rather have a sense of happiness that is quick-lived or joy that lingers in your heart? Happiness is the small and big delights in the day to day. For me, it’s
"Now and then it’s good to pause in our pursuit of happiness and just be happy." - Guillaume Apollinaire
3. Instead of waiting for happiness to make its way to you, or you to it, incorporate it into your daily life. Find those simple joys that light up your heart, that bring a smile to your face. We often look at happiness as if it’s some goal we must reach, when in reality it’s our birthright that we can experience on a daily basis.
If there’s one thing I’ve learned it’s that to feel real happiness, it has to resonate with your soul. Take some time to reflect on what brings your soul joy. The exercise below is quite helpful as you navigate the pursuit of your own happiness.
Sending you a heart hug, Adrienne :)
As 2023 is winding down to its end, I’ve been taking time to reflect on the past year and where I want my focus to be in 2024. To be honest, 2023 was a freaking hard year. I felt so lost, so many things didn’t work out or fell through, and there were a lot of disappointments. I’ve been feeling so incredibly frustrated because my life isn’t how I want it to be (yet). My first thought was “ugh — another year wasted!” Then, I made a list of the main events from 2023 and found that my year was far from wasted and was actually full of growth and shifts. Some of my highlights include:
Another thing I came to realize is that whenever I got out of my head and heeded those inner nudges, I found the inspiration and motivation I needed. As I look back on this year, instead of berating myself, I recognize that I have every reason to pat myself on the back and congratulate myself for all of the effort I’ve put in, as well as the personal growth I’ve accomplished. How about you? What are some of the highlights from your year? What challenges have you overcome? What can you pat yourself on the back for? What are some areas you know you still need to work on in the coming year?
As I thought about 2024, instead of focusing on setting resolutions (that are the best of intentions, but don’t seem to get too far), I wanted to look at what energy I’d be bringing into the new year. I began to focus on what determined action I’d be taking and what determined progress I’d be making. Don’t you just love those terms - determined action and determined progress? I have a pretty huge goal for 2024. I know that I will put everything I have into it instead of just trying it out and hoping for the best. I will visualize, I will take action, and I will clear out any self-sabotage that’s standing in my way. I will do what it takes to achieve this dream that’s been on my mind and in my heart for years.
How about you? Is there something you want to create in your life? Is there a trip you want to take? Maybe there’s a class you’d like to try? Is there something that you’ve been wanting, but have put off due to circumstances or not knowing how to go about it? I encourage you to set your sights on it and in 2024 take the determined action, so you can make your determined progress, and achieve your goal.
Wishing you a beautiful rest of the holiday season and a most wonderful new year, Adrienne :)
As a kid, I absolutely hated taking naps. As an adult, I miss those days. I was lucky to experience siestas while I lived in Mexico in the 90’s. I would student teach all morning, go back to the casa where I was staying for lunch, which is the main meal of the day, and then it was siesta time. Everyone in the house did this. Whether they slept or watched tv, it was a time to rejuvenate before heading back to work or school. Sadly, the siesta isn’t a very common practice these days. We live in a world where it’s go-go-go all the time. When we feel sleepy during the day, instead of taking a short rest, the go-to is usually caffeine. When we don’t get enough rest we can feel scattered, stressed, moody, have a foggy brain, be more easily triggered, be less productive, and our immune system can be impacted - and not in a good way.
“Instead of asking, 'Have I worked hard enough to deserve a rest?' I've started asking, 'Have I rested enough to do my most loving, meaningful work?’” -Nicola Jane Hobbs
I think this quote provides a great re-frame for prioritizing rest. We all have a million things to do, but if we can’t take care of ourselves then how can we show up fully in our life? Why is it that we don’t allow ourselves time to rest? Why can’t rest be included on the must-do lists we have running each day? I’m not saying to carve out an hour - though if you can, that’s great. Even 15 minutes to just decompress would be better than not at all. Use that time to lie down and close your eyes, to relax, or sit comfortably and meditate. If you can’t leave work, try getting outside and finding a bench to sit and relax on. The point is to give yourself some time to let your body slow down, to disengage your brain, and to take a break from the screens, notifications, emails, and scrolling.
"You often feel tired not because you've done too much, but because you’ve done too little of what sparks a light in you." - Alexander Den Heijer
Another way to look at this is that we over-program ourselves with everything we feel we have to do and not enough of what we want to do. Life isn’t meant to be oppressive. There are so many ways you can incorporate some joy into your life on the daily. What lights you up? What helps you feel more energized? What are you passionate about? How can you incorporate what sparks a light in you into any given day?
“You should sit in meditation for twenty minutes every day – unless you're too busy; then you should sit for an hour.” - Dr. Sukhraj Dhillon
I think the above quote can also apply to rest. As the holidays approach, we’ll be busier and likely more stressed which is all the more reason to prioritize some time to rest. Resting is self-care. It allows us to fill our cups so we can share instead of depleting from a deficit. What do you do when your phone battery is low? You charge it. You are way more important and valuable than your phone, but are you taking care of your battery? If you are too busy to take a quick siesta, make sure you incorporate into your day something that lights you up, that energizes your soul. Take some you-time so you can be more present, more refreshed. It’s a gift that gives to everyone.
Heart hugs, Adrienne :)
Something you may not know about me is that I love K-dramas (Korean dramas). They are so good. I usually can’t sit through any US show for more than 5 minutes, but K-dramas are full of twists, turns, surprises, and emotional roller coasters. I recently watched one called Daily Dose of Sunshine which is currently on Netflix. It’s about a nurse who transfers to the psychiatry department. We are brought into a world of those dealing with mental health issues from panic attacks to self-harm, depression to schizophrenia. It’s not just about those in the psych ward, but others who are out in the world trying to live their daily lives while caring for their mental health. This drama addresses the denial, the prejudices, and the heartbreak that those with mental health issues, as well as their family and loved ones, experience. The nurse ends up in a psych ward herself for a while due to the suicide of one of her patients - offering viewers another perspective. This drama was beautifully done. It’s well-scripted, well-acted, and definitely worth a watch.
We need more awareness and compassion for those who are struggling with mental health issues and for those around them who are trying to support them. Thankfully, these days, mental health is starting to get the attention that it deserves and is much needed. Decades ago, it was so taboo to even think about seeing a “shrink.” I probably would’ve been a lot happier and handled things way better had I found some help, but the idea of that somehow becoming a stigma against all of my hard work and achievements kept me from taking that step. I handled it all on my own, the best I could manage. It wasn’t until I ended up in a specialist’s office for ocular migraines that it was suggested that I see a psychotherapist and that doctor happened to know one of the best. This was about 2 years or so after my gifts opened up in Sedona. I thought it would be good to get a professional’s opinion on whether I was crazy or not. I figured she’d gently let me know if I was delusional as I explained my work with the Angels. It was quite the opposite. Harriotte was one of the best gifts the Universe could’ve given me. She helped me see that I wasn’t crazy and that I don’t have to go through so much alone. She helped me see where I had to reframe my thinking. She saw my Light - which in turn made me want to see it too.
Back to the K-drama. As I watched the episodes unfold, I could resonate on so many levels with the emotions and difficulties the actors were portraying. I started to do some reflection and introspection and I had some great breakthroughs that were perspective shifting. One realization I had was around self-worth. As someone who struggled for decades with low self-esteem, it all of a sudden seemed so obvious: there is no such thing as self-worth. There is no living being who is more or less worthy than another. We are all inherently worthy, yet we tend to base and scale our worth on others' expectations and perceptions - how many followers one has, how much money one makes, how much success one has, to name a few. I realized that it’s not even about whether we’re worthy or not, it’s about meaning. It’s not even a question (though we do tend to question it) whether our life has meaning - every life has meaning. We, as we exist, are meaning-full and our existence has meaning. There’s no scale to judge yourself by, unless you choose to lean on one. You have meaning, your life has meaning, and that is enough. The fun is in figuring out what that meaning is for you, what you can contribute and share with others.
Another realization I had was about growing pains. We have them when we’re physically growing, but we also have them throughout our life as we face challenges and situations that either force us to grow or are opportunities for growth. No one wants to be in pain, but it is there to get our attention, it can teach us something, and it needs to be processed and released. Since I can feel other people's pain empathically, I just want to take that suffering away from them. I want to help them return to a state of feeling good or at least better. It doesn’t work that way. I’m not here to take away my clients' pain, I’m here to help them move through it more quickly and easily than if they tried to go through it on their own. This realization gave me more clarity on the work that I’m putting out into the world and it unexpectedly, and gratefully, took some of the weight off my shoulders.
In the drama, they suggested to the lead character that she keep a compliment journal. Through this exercise, she discovered that complimenting herself was a lot more rewarding than receiving a compliment from others. We’re usually so hard on ourselves - judging, criticizing what we did or didn’t do on any given day. How often do we cheer ourselves on? I’ve started putting this into practice. It’s actually an awesome exercise. How often do you compliment yourself? Can you find at least one thing to compliment yourself on each day? It can be on the most trivial things or the ones that you feel proud of. This exercise helps us become less reliant on external compliments and gives us a stronger sense of self.
Mental health is something we all should be paying attention to. What thoughts are you focusing on? Do they bring you peace or the opposite? Just as it’s important to feed your body healthy food, it’s equally important to feed your mind healthy thoughts. Are you immersed in the news or pulled into scrolling on your phone? What nourishment are you giving your mind that feels good and gives you a sense of joy or lightness? The last line of the drama states, “Each one of us is standing on the border between normal and abnormal.” Just as anyone can get physically ill, anyone can encounter mental health issues as well. Addressing our mental health and getting the help we may need - there is no shame in that.
P.S. I was listening to a playlist and this song by Lily Meola came up. I think it fits this blog post.
Sending you the biggest heart hug, Adrienne ☀️
One of the biggest questions we have is ‘What happens after death?’ Do we just disappear? Do we end up in Heaven or maybe Hell? There is plenty of evidence from mediums, people who have had near-death experiences, and peoples' very own personal experiences that our loved ones still continue to exist once they’ve left their physical form. One belief that many religions and ancient traditions hold is that the soul continues after death. Personally, I’ve been visited in my dream by my best friend after she passed away. I've felt my grandpa’s energy so strongly, like his energy intermingled with my cells for a moment, the day after he passed. I’ve delivered messages on behalf of the deceased. I’ve helped and watched many cross over. I’ve witnessed a squirrel die and then saw its energy pop up right next to its body. To me, there is no doubt that we continue on once we disconnect from our physical body. It’s also my belief that hell is a man-made creation, but that’s for a different post.
Today is Día de Muertos - Day of the Dead - a day when the souls of the deceased return among the living to visit with their loved ones. November 1st is dedicated to the souls of children and November 2nd is for adults. There are still towns and people in México who celebrate this pre-Hispanic tradition that morphed with Catholicism. They set up altars in their home, or at the cemetery, using candles, photos of those who have passed, and some kind of religious symbols - usually of the Virgen de Guadalupe. They also put out the deceased's favorite foods for them to enjoy, as well as toys, if it’s a child or alcohol for the adults. Traditional orange marigold flowers are used due to the belief that their scent and color help lead the departed back to their loved ones. Día de los Muertos isn’t about the absence of those who have passed on, it’s about celebrating and honoring their living presence.
I know many of you reading this have experienced the passing of family, friends, or other people who are dear to you. Death is not easy for the living as we’re left to cope with the grief of loss of the physical. Honor those emotions and feelings. Give yourself a chance to feel and process them. When you feel ready, I invite you to create your own tradition to celebrate those who have passed on. Something I do on the deathdate of my best friend is I find a beautiful flower and toss it into a body of water - whether I’m near a lake, ocean, or pond at that time. It can be as simple or as grand as you’d like to make it. It's a beautiful way that allows us the time and presence so we can have that connection with our loved ones in spirit. Life should be a celebration - and death as well as it’s just our transition back home, it's not the end.
I found the following short clip from Coco that shows an example of an altar:
Heart hugs, Adrienne :)
Volcanoes and I don’t have the best relationship. My first time climbing a volcano was in the 90’s in Ecuador. It was the Cotopaxi and I wasn’t told that I needed sunglasses to protect my eyes. Due to the snow and being on the equator, I ended up burning the corneas of my eyes. The optometrist said that my contact lenses saved my eyes from the tiny ice particles and possible blindness. Another volcano I climbed was Mt. Fuji in Japan. I had a really hard time due to altitude sickness and ended up with some phsyical ailments that took about a year to overcome. Then, there was the Villarica volcano in Chile. I almost lost my life on that one. That was the tipping point that helped me realize that maybe I shouldn’t be climbing volcanoes.
Volcanoes tend to represent the duality of creation and destruction, death and rebirth. Myths are created around them, deities are associated with them. The legend of Popocatepetl and Iztaccíhuatl is one such story that is worth a read. The Izta actually does look like a woman lying down. Volcanoes can trigger earthquakes, tsunamis, mudflows, and pyroclastic flows. Pyroclastic flows and surges are the most dangerous as they are fast moving (as in 62-435 mph) hot (1800F) gas and volcanic matter. It’s what took out the people of Pompeii. I’ve been to Pompeii and warily stared at the still active Mt. Vesuvius. The largest active volcano is Mauna Loa on the Big Island of Hawaii - also a place I have visited.
Within the last few years, volcanoes have started showing up in my dreams, or maybe I should say nightmares. I’m used to tornado dreams which signify for me that big change is coming. I’m still figuring out what the volcanoes mean for me. In general, they can signify a repressed emotion that, unless dealt with, may surge forward. Most typically, they represent repressed anger. They can also represent transformation. They can reflect the stress, anxiety, and upheavals of our waking life. If you find there’s a recurring theme to your dreams, it’s time to pay attention.
My most recent volcanic adventure was last spring in Mexico. I woke up one morning to ashfall - like snowfall, but ash. Surprisingly, ash is really heavy and it gets EVERYWHERE. The Popocatepetl was way more active than usual. We wondered if an eruption was soon to follow.
Translation: The Popo at 7am, this is why there's so much ash. Source: unknown
I was staying at a place just inside the evacuation zone. The ash was no joke, it made it hard to breathe and hurt like no other when it got into your eyes. I was pretty shocked that the mask and goggles I ordered on Amazon showed up the very next day. I had a go-bag ready, and spent nights watching the live feed cameras as material ejected from the crater. If you’re caught in a pyroclastic flow, there's pretty much no escape. There was a point when I wondered, is this how I die? That sucked. I watched interviews of people who lived the closest and in the biggest danger zones. They’ve lived with the volcano their entire lives. One woman said in an interview that she didn’t know how they expected people to evacuate when the roads were covered in potholes and speed bumps. Other than a woman who worked at the place where I was staying (and insisted we were all going to die), everyone else just went about their daily lives. I got the following video on social media and laughed a ton of the stress away.
Thankfully, el Popo quieted down. Hundreds of millions of people around the world live near or even on volcanoes. They are a terrifying, yet beautiful force of Nature. And, for some reason, have been an integral part of my adventures and life.
Heart Hugs, Adrienne :)
We don't need to worry 'cause when we fall, we know how to land
When I first heard the song "Permission to Dance" (BTS), the above lyric really hit me. I thought, I know very well how to fall, but do I know how to land? I sure didn’t think so. One of the singers from BTS, Suga (민윤기), had spoken about this during an interview:
“I’ve said several times that I’m afraid of falling, but not landing. And the difference between falling and landing is that landing means that you can take off again.”
As someone who is used to falling, for me, landing meant either going SPLAT and face planting into misery or it meant the end. The end of a relationship, a failed project, an important missed opportunity - you name it. Seeing it as an opportunity to take off again wasn’t really in my vocabulary. My inner critic adamantly confirmed that with, "You’re right, you’re not resilient. You’ve been beaten down too many times. Just stay down…”
The definition of resilience is the capacity to withstand or to recover quickly from difficulties. There are many kinds of resiliency: physical, mental, emotional, social, financial, job loss, divorce, failure - pretty much any area of life that can be challenging. Now, as someone who has felt like the least resilient person on the planet, I knew this was an area I needed to strengthen. I once heard a fellow student, during a class I was taking, comment on resilience and alchemy. She basically said that it’s not only about getting back up, but transforming into something greater. I began to wonder, how do we find or tap into our resiliency so that we can alchemize it? I learned that a big part of it is through awareness.
You have to become aware that you actually are resilient - think of times where you’ve been resilient in the past. I made it to the top of Mt. Fuji while fighting altitude sickness which led to some physical issues after the fact. I made it up, and down, and recovered - there’s an example of resiliency. Think of how your body recovers from illness and trauma. Think of how you can find another job after being laid off or fired. Think of how you open yourself back up for love after a heart wrenching breakup. Think of how you pivot so you don’t give up on your dream. These are all examples of resilience. I figured out a little formula, that I call the 4Rs, for when I’m in a challenging situation that calls for resiliency:
The truth of the matter is we are way more resilient than we tend to believe. It’s an inner strength that we all have access to. Just as Nature is resilient, so are we. When we can tap into that resiliency we can navigate life’s challenges more easily. Let’s be honest, with as crazy as the world is right now, we need our resilience more than ever. There is another comment that Suga made in the interview that sums it all up perfectly:
“So, no matter how desperate the situation is, if we choose landing instead of falling, choose not to give up, and just land, we’re ready to fly again.”
Falling can be really scary, but at some point we will land and we will have that inner resilience to tap into to decide where we’ll go from there. If we can put our attention on landing instead of on the fact that we’re falling, we can direct our energy to harness what we learned and launch ourselves into something even greater. The next time you find yourself facing a big challenge, I invite you to focus on the landing, alchemize what you’ve learned from the situation, and use it as fuel to take off stronger and wiser so you can fly in the direction of your goals, dreams, and desires.
Heart Hugs, Adrienne :)
In the fall of last year, I saw an announcement for my 30 year high school reunion. I haven’t attended any past reunions and for some reason I really felt compelled to go to this one. In fact, I made up my mind to go. Then, the doubts started creeping in. How could I go? I had nothing to show for myself. I wasn’t married, didn’t have kids, the work I do is still considered “woo woo” in these parts - I felt like I’d be judged as a failure. I knew I’d have to do some serious re-framing of this mindset or I wouldn’t end up going. Plus, it made me feel like crap. I recognized that I was the one judging myself as a failure and would need to shift that. Thankfully, the Universe intervened in the form of an email.
The subject line was ‘No more hiding your badassery.’ It was from Amber, from Woman Unleashed (I highly recommend that you check her out). Basically, she pointed out that we often censor our greatness. Society has told us (women) not to brag or boast or make others feel uncomfortable with our achievements. She’s right, why should we play small? Instead, let’s celebrate what we’ve accomplished. She shared a list of amazing things she’s achieved over the years and ended that list with “I am a badass.” I was really inspired and sat down to write my own list. Once I finished, I was really amazed - I’ve accomplished A LOT. Here are a few things from my list:
How could I think of myself as a failure when I look at the life I’ve lived and what I’ve been able to achieve? This list helped me shift my thinking and how I saw myself. The conventional life wasn’t for me. I’ve wanted to really explore and experience life, which I did and still do. This list gave me a confidence boost. It helped me see myself through a new lens. It helped me define success and failure in a new way.
Going to the reunion was definitely outside of my comfort zone - none of my good friends were going, I didn’t have a plus one, I’m introverted, and even on the drive there my ego was like, “it’s not too late, let’s not go.” Thankfully, I didn’t listen. I told my ego that we’d go for 30 minutes and if I wasn’t enjoying it, I could leave. I actually ended up staying for several hours and had a great time catching up with people. I even won an award for the most countries traveled to.
I’m sharing this experience with you in the hopes that you’ll feel inspired to write your own badassery list and celebrate your accomplishments. That you take a moment from the inner and outer judgments and noise to reflect on what has meaning for you. That you take those steps outside of your comfort zone so your soul can stretch, grow, and learn. If you’re someone who has been playing small, that you decide to play big. You deserve that. From one badass to another, I see you and I celebrate you!
Heart Hugs, Adrienne :)
As it's Valentine’s Day, it seems like a good time to take a moment to look at our relationships - especially one you have probably never considered before (more on that in a moment). If anything, this global pause has allowed us to take the time to take stock of our relationships, the ones we value and the ones needing changed. Our relationships extend past romantic interests and include family, friends, colleagues, and neighbors. There are also spiritual and religious relationships. What we tend to forget, though, is that the most important relationship is the one that we have with ourselves.
I’d like you to take a moment to think about how your relationship is with yourself. Is it a loving one? Is it abusive? Do you pay more heed to the inner bully, the inner critic? What kind of conversations do you have with yourself? Are they positive and encouraging or are they more self-deprecating? More often than not, do you tend to love yourself or hate yourself? Do you embrace yourself fully or do you wish you were different? From a young age we are taught that we must please others, live up to external expectations, and tend to our external relationships - all while paying little to no heed to ourselves. It is not selfish to focus on your relationship with yourself - in fact, it is necessary.
We are spiritual beings living a human life. Most of us tend to get to know ourselves as our ego, but rarely take it further to get to know the divine aspect that we also are. We are so much more than what we believe. We often tend to look to others to fulfill what we feel we are lacking - love, worthiness, happiness, compassion... All of that exists within ourselves. We have to take the time to re-learn how to tap into it. Meditation is a great way to start. If meditation is too challenging, begin by setting the intent and desire to get to know your true self. You can journal, have a conversation with your Soul, or look at yourself in the mirror and begin to look past your layers of ego identity. Peeling back all of the labels, acknowledge that aspect of who you truly are - your Soul self. Every relationship begins with and is sustained by connection and communication.
Another relationship you should be taking a look at, especially in these times, is your relationship with fear. - Fear? - What? - Why? I know, seems a little crazy, right? The truth is, we have greatly misunderstood fear. We have given it a monster-like identity that doesn’t allow us to see the whole picture. Though it may feel like it at times, fear is not there to make our lives miserable. Fear serves a far greater purpose. It's also important to know that fear plays a much bigger role in our daily lives than we realize. It shows up disguised in our beliefs and our emotions. You might be surprised as to how many of your decisions are actually fear-based.
We are all being impacted by fear on a continual basis - consciously, subconsciously, and collectively. Due to the range of events over the past year, the collective fear has been very intense. It may seem like it’s completely out of your control, but it’s not. Did you know that you can form a partnership with your fear and be empowered in your response to it? It’s absolutely possible, for anyone.
I have put together a free live intensive training on seeing fear through a new perspective. It’s called Fear: The Other Side Of The Story. In this webinar, you will see fear in a new light, you will learn where fear actually comes from (the 5 contributing players), you will see where fear plays a role in your daily life, you will learn where fear hides and how to tap into it, and you will be provided with tools to help you soothe and work with your fear. It’s more important than ever to become aware of fear’s role in our lives. Isn’t it time we stop allowing ourselves to be manipulated through fear - especially when we do it to ourselves without even realizing it?
In this month of love, remember to also turn it towards yourself. Take the extra time and effort to let those you have a valuable relationship with know how much they mean to you. Lastly, I challenge you to show your fear some love by gaining a new perspective on it, which you can do by attending the live webinar training. I wish you a Happy Valentine’s Day.
Heart hugs and love to you, Adrienne :)
These past few weeks I’ve felt like a piñata. Trying to meet deadlines and a launch date and it all kept going wrong. So many stressful little things kept happening and then came the 2x4s. From my computer giving out (whack) to my new computer being defective (whack). In the course of one week, I accidentally poured freshly boiled water over my hand (whack), got the worst food poisoning I’ve ever had - resulting in 20 consecutive hours of vomiting - (whack, whack, whack), and my car decided to stop working in the middle of the interstate, needing a tow that took 4 hours to arrive, and over $700 in repairs and expenses (W-H-A-C-K). That was the blow that finally did it. I retreated. I’d had enough. My nerves were shot and my guts were starting to spill - and they weren’t candy.
Over the course of a few days, I went through a few stages. First, I was the victim - life, god, the universe, whatever it is, was beating the crap out of me. Why? How many beatings was I supposed to take? Why did I become the punching bag? What did I do to end up on the universe’s shit list? I noticed a lot of deep resentment and dread - what’s next? How far will this go? Will I be pushed past my breaking point?
Then, I got mad - furious, actually. I went from being the piñata to holding the proverbial stick and I started swinging. Of course there was no piñata for me to hit back since god/source/universe is such an abstract construct. I was just swinging into empty space - hurling my frustrations and curses into nothingness. It was so exhausting and, frankly, even more infuriating.
Next, I decided I was tired of the game. I didn’t want to play anymore. Bills, responsibilities, my project - all got pushed to the side as I binged Kdramas and chocolate. Reality was really sucking and I needed a break. It’s easy to get sucked into distractions, especially when you’re in a state of sheer overwhelm. I let myself disconnect, but I also knew I had to deal with it all sooner rather than later or I’d just be making things a lot harder on myself.
“It could be worse” - I really hate it when people tell me that. Of course it could be worse, but the situation at hand isn’t so swell either. When someone tells me that ‘it could be worse,’ it feels like they aren’t acknowledging how challenging and hard it already is; like they’re dismissing or discounting my experience and my feelings around it. What would be helpful is someone saying, “Wow, that’s awful. Is there anything I can do to help? I’m just glad the situation's not any worse.” ‘That’s awful’ acknowledges the experience and how I feel about it. ‘Can I help?’ can feel like a lifeline even if there’s nothing they can do. ‘I’m glad it’s not any worse’ allows for some space to open up in order to hold gratitude that it isn't any worse. The way we word things really does make a difference.
I don’t like being a victim, being the person trying to hit an invisible piñata isn’t satisfying either, and just taking myself out of it all by burying my head in the sand with distractions can only work for so long. I decided I needed a new way to look at things. If my suffering is connected to my thinking, to my perceptions, then that’s where I have to shift. I think it begins with curiosity. I find it curious that so many challenges came up one after the other and then some of them completely stopped me - the food poisoning kept me in bed for days, the car left me stuck - all at a time when I needed every hour in order to launch. What message was I not getting that those cosmic 2x4s had to come in? Needless to say, the universe has my attention. I guess it’s time to turn off Netflix and figure out what it’s been trying to say.
It’s been nearly four years since I last posted in this blog. After writing weekly for three years, I decided to take a break. I didn’t realize that my hiatus would last this long. A lot has transpired since I last wrote, both in the world and in my own life. To catch you up a bit on where I’ve been and what I’ve been up to, I’d like to share about my time living and working at a Tibetan Buddhist retreat center pertaining to the Dalai Lama.
For several years, Menla, known as Tibet in the Catskills, became my home. It’s a peaceful and beautiful retreat center nestled in a valley, high up in the Catskill mountains in New York. I love this place for so many reasons: the nature, the people, the quiet, and its mission as part of Tibet House US to help ensure the survival of Tibetan culture. For an empath, it was like medicine for mind and body. There’s a special energy there that’s similar to Sedona, except it’s not as intense and is more embracing and nurturing.
I worked in the Dewa Spa on property. Dewa Spa is distinct in that there’s a focus on Tibetan medicine and healing. I highly recommend the KuNye massage by the way. I still worked with clients doing my Emotional Blockages Release sessions, but I mainly worked as a spa coordinator and assisted in keeping the spa running - from booking appointments to stocking treatment rooms to picking the flowers that would go into the special baths that we ran for guests. Ironically, the job was far from relaxing, but the space itself, and most especially the people, are what made it great. I have never seen so many talented massage therapists under one roof. Healers in their own right, the before and after differences in the guests said it all. My co-workers were more like family. Some of the biggest-hearted, most wonderful people I’ve ever met.
Hiking was literally steps from my back door. There are multiple trails on property from easy to challenging. The water, sourced from a mountain stream, is the only water I’d ever drink straight from the tap - it’s that good. There are phenomenal gardens which source flowers for the arrangements found around property and veggies, greens, and fruit for the kitchen. A true farm to table with no toxic chemicals used. The mainly vegetarian kitchen prepares some of the most delicious food. Who knew that watermelon salsa tastes so good on black bean tacos?! Hiking up the mountain, I could feel where the wifi would drop off. There’s no cell service or TV at Menla which provides the perfect opportunity to connect with yourself and with Nature.
Probably my favorite part about Menla is the wildlife. I felt like I was inside a show of Animal Planet. On my 8 minute walk to work, I could encounter a group of wild turkeys, deer, black bears and or snakes - all up close. The deer would show up at the spa and wait patiently for us to bring them a treat - usually apples. The bears were hilarious - napping in the apple trees, hanging from the enclosure door while trying to access the trash bins, rooting through the compost pile, or just chilling wherever.
Though Buddhist by nature, Menla is a place where you can connect to that aspect, but it isn’t forced. Michael, the co-director, would generously lead classes for staff that would dive deeper into the practices and teachings - which I appreciated. I always enjoyed hearing Bob Thurman speak. Bob is a scholar of Indo-Tibetan Buddhist studies and friend of H.H. the Dalai Lama. Side note: Bob and Michael created the graphic novel Man of Peace: The Illustrated Life Story of the Dalai Lama of Tibet which is a very good read. Isa Gucciardi, a Buddhist shaman, is a definite favorite. I had some amazing shifts and insights due to her journeys and teachings when she would lead retreats at Menla.
As with anything, life changes and chapters come to a close. Menla, and most especially the people I worked with there, will always hold a special place in my heart. I was able to learn new skills, immerse myself in nature, and my EBR sessions continued to evolve as I met new clients. It was a challenging time, it was a healing time, it was a time and space for me to connect with my true nature. As John Muir aptly stated, "and into the forest I go to lose my mind and find my soul."
Heart Hugs, Adrienne :)
I refuse to be defined as racist, misogynistic, sexist, etc. just because the man who was elected as president appears to represent these traits. I am not my government. I am a human being. I am a human being who does her very best to break down the social filters and see my brothers and sisters with love. I don’t care what color you are, what sex you are, what religion you practice, what country you’re from, or who your partner is. I accept you for you. I've had the amazing opportunity to have lived in other countries and experience many other cultures. What I learned is that we may look different and act differently, but essentially we’re all the same. We all want to be loved and accepted for who we are. What I hold dear about the U.S. is that we're this beautiful melting pot. I love our uniqueness and our differences. Think of how boring it would be if we were all the same. How would we ever learn and grow from each other without our differences? Having lived in NYC, I can tell you that peaceful co-existence between people from every culture on this planet is not only a possibility, it is a reality.
As a woman, who has had enough experience with living in a yanged-out (over masculinated) society, I can join the bandwagon and lament how the outcome of this election sets us back. Or, I can allow it to make me stronger. The president does not represent me. I represent me. If I want to find peace on this planet then I will start with myself. I will do my work. I will commit to my own healing. Trump may be an elected official - but he does not represent or define me as a human being. One of my biggest peeves traveling abroad was that I was automatically judged and criticized for being an American. I had to remind myself - I am not my government. I couldn’t understand how people, who did not know me or bother to get to know me, could look at me and treat me with hatred just because of my nationality. Fear does that you know, it divides and it conquers - if you allow it.
I recently read a great description about fear that I feel is very important to share. "Fear is the baseline negative state. Not just some of the time, or even most of the time. All the time. (...) Fear is nothing. It's a parasite. It has no core, no life force of its own. It feeds on life, so when its stories don't take you in, and you don't react to them, but instead just observe it, you deny fear a place to feed. And when it has nowhere to feed, it begins to dissipate. Every time. So each time you look fear in the face, it will weaken, shrink and finally disappear." (Book 3 of The Grandmothers Speak, Sharon McErlane). Simply, fear is just a parasite - it’s your choice whether you will feed it or not.
It’s time for we the people to rise up and BE the change we want to see. Stop looking outside and blaming others. Take our own responsibility. There is so much fear in the world - it is projected on a daily basis through ignorance, anger, rage, hatred, you name it. You always have a choice to feed that fear or not. It’s your choice to buy into it and allow it to grow -or to see it for what it is, not participate and allow it to weaken. It's time we stop pointing fingers and do our own work.
I’ve seen a lot of comments about 'what will I tell my daughter?' You tell her the truth - there are people out there who are confused. They only see the surface of someone and act from a place of social conditioning that is no longer acceptable (and never should have been in the first place). This does not change her worth. She is not less than just because someone else says so. Eleanor Roosevelt hit the nail on the head: No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. Encourage her to step into the beautiful person that she is and to see others through the same loving, respectful eyes that you ask her to see herself.
This election actually provides us with the amazing opportunity to really make this world a better place. We know what we don’t want, so let’s focus on what we do want - love, acceptance, joy, community. Be loving and accepting of yourself and share that energy with everyone you meet. Some may not be that open to it as they’re too entrapped in the fear and ego game. That’s o.k. You send them love anyway - they really need it. We are only set back as a country if we the people allow it - it comes down to our own individual actions. So as it goes with free will, you have the choice to perpetuate fear, ignorance and division or BE the loving Soul that you are. It doesn’t come down to Trump, it comes down to you.
Love, Adrienne :)
"Success requires the emotional balance of a committed heart. When confronted with a challenge, the committed heart will search for a solution. The undecided heart searches for an escape."
Hello! I'm Adrienne Almamour, an empathic intuitive conduit. I assist people by detecting and clearing their subconscious emotional energy blockages. This blog is a commentary and reflection of life from an intuitive standpoint which also incorporates ways that allow us to be from our heart.